Deviating from wedding registries--how gauche is it?
August 8, 2010 5:25 PM Subscribe
I'm attending a wedding next weekend, of a couple that has irritated me throughout the course of their tumultuous engagement. I've looked over their many registries, and have found nothing that I consider worthwhile or practical to give in my price range. What are my other alternatives?
The bride is family to my husband, and I've known the groom by way of his family for over ten years. Their engagement was on-again/off-again, and irritating at best--first from their excessively public and saccharine displays of their relationship, then by the excessively public and drama-filled displays of their broken engagement, then by their equally excessively public and saccharine displays of their re-engagement. A slew of seemingly gift-happy invitations to engagement parties and various showers did not help the situation. I was happy about this relationship to begin with, but their behavior throughout the course of their engagements has left me with more than a sour taste in my mouth.
I'm having a difficult time deciding what to do about a wedding gift. I would love to give them something thoughtful and useful--I generally put a great deal of thought into my gift-giving endeavors, and I take great pleasure in finding that "perfect gift"--but their registries have left me cold. They seem to have gone through the stores where they registered like kids in a candy store, rather than putting thought into what they would actually need and use in setting up their new home. I realize that may be an unfair judgment to make, but I'd rather not buy them a fondue set that I'm fairly certain will sit in the back of their storage closet for years to come.
The best idea I could come up with for an acceptable wedding gift to deviate from the registry for is an Ikea gift card--but would that be considered rude and improper? They are a very young couple, both living away from home for the first time, so I figured Ikea would be a great place to "fill in" the gaps of what they didn't register for. What would you give as an alternative to a registry item?