I need a job and I can't find one

June 25, 2010 9:32 AM

No job, no money, nobody who can help. What do I do?

28, female, UK (living in Brighton currently; perfectly willing to go to London to work, but have had no luck there either). Living with my SO.

It shouldn't be so hard to find a job. I'm intelligent and well-educated, and yet any job I've applied for, I hear nothing back from (or at best a polite "no thanks"). I suspect I'm either overqualified or underqualified for most things; I unfortunately have a degree in a pretty non-practical subject (BA in Communication and Media Studies, Master's in Writing for TV & New Media). I speak two languages (English and Italian), but that doesn't seem to be doing me much good either.

The last job I held was McDonald's. That was a year ago; I had to quit because I needed to move to a different city. I've applied to them again several times (any port in a storm), heard nothing back.

My SO has had no luck finding a job either. He has a valid visa for the UK and is a recent Cambridge graduate - I would've thought that even if nobody wanted ME, at least somebody would want HIM, but no luck so far.

My parents are unwilling to offer any further financial help. Their offer would be for me to move back in with them (in a different country), while my SO finds "somewhere" to stay here in the UK and some sort of a job, I find some sort of a job in my home country, and "eventually" move back to the UK. This is unworkable due to inability for my SO to find anywhere to stay at all (we have no friends who can even offer so much as a sofa).

Another offer from them is for both me and my SO to move to stay with them, but that's also unworkable for a lot of reasons. (Including the fact that my SO would need a visa, and chiefly the fact that my parents are the controlling kind and I have no wish to place MYSELF back in their clutches, never mind my SO whom they very much dislike and who doesn't even speak the language of the country we'd be moving to.)

Even if I moved back in with my parents and abandoned my SO (which seems to be what they're expecting me to do), I would have no life. They'd expect me to be grateful for the help and do everything they say, exactly as they say, find the exact kind of job they'd want for me, who cares what I want - even the thought is frankly making me sick to my stomach.

My SO's parents can't offer any further financial help either (due to lack of money rather than unwillingness on their part). My SO can't move back to his home country to live with his parents due to personal reasons (which I'd rather not go into here).

I just... I don't know what to DO. Every day spent in this situation erodes my self-confidence and self-esteem a little bit further, and I feel like I'm spiraling down into a hole with no escape from. I have no doubts that this is not helping the situation, but I have no idea how to get out of this.

If anybody has any insight, or any help to offer, please, PLEASE drop a comment. I'm at the end of my rope. Email is [e-mail] if there's anything else you might want to know.

posted by anonymous to Work & Money (21 answers total)

This sounds like the situation I found myself in when I first graduated, and some people I know are still in now. I couldn't afford to move to places that had jobs, or had savings, or parents who could help, nor go back to further study to get an accredited Masters that might help me get other jobs. What I did do was temp for a while, saved up, and moved when I did find a job. I know it's not as easy as that, and I know I was lucky to be able to move home during a period when I had no job (less easy to do at 28). I was absolutely miserable unemployed and I know just how you feel.

There are a few agencies in London that are looking for bilingual telephone operators - thwere's one at Ealing Broadway. Might be worth looking into for now. Also, have you tried any temp agencies in London? Judy Fisher and PFJ specialise in media.

You could also try teaching language - my SO went to Japan to teach English, but I imagine there are a lot of language schools in London and the South Coast. However, you may need to get a TEFL first which does cost money.

What is your SO#s degree in?
posted by mippy at 9:37 AM on June 25, 2010

Oh - please apply for anything you might want to do. I didn't apply for actual media jobs for a long time because I knew I couldn't afford to do unpaid work experience, so assumed I was underqualified for them. I applied for a lot of admin jobs because I had done temp work and knew I could do them eyes closed. Never got any of them. Then, the first BBC job I applied for, I got.

Keep your eye on all the job sites of any company you might be interested in working for, and please don't be afraid to keep giving it a go. If you're not sure what you want, perhaps your university offers help through their careers service to graduates (I know Manchester did for about five years post-graduation).
posted by mippy at 9:40 AM on June 25, 2010

You might already be doing this. But are you adapted your resumes to suit the job s your applying for? If you're applying at McDonald's leave off the the Master's. Have you been looking for telecommuting jobs? It seems like community management or PR blog type stuff would be right up your alley. Sorry if you've already tried these. I assume other people are looking at your resume and cover letters. I'm just remembering a horror story where someone was sending his bartender resume to receptionist positions and his receptionist resume to bartender positions. You say no one else can help. A lot of job finding is social do you have friends who know of lower level positions in organizations they work in that can hold you over? Beg if you have to. Good luck avoiding your parents clutches.
posted by edbles at 9:46 AM on June 25, 2010

Have you tried baby-sitting/dog-sitting?
posted by onepot at 9:47 AM on June 25, 2010

Sorry, I hit "post" prematurely. When I was in a similar position many moons ago , I had a lot of success posting ads offering baby-sitting services in places that got a lot of parent traffic (e.g., in/around private and public schools). I ended up with a lovely job taking care of a preschooler; this got me through some lean NYC years.

Good luck.
posted by onepot at 9:52 AM on June 25, 2010

You're a good writer, and educated in media. Have you tried freelance writing? I know little about today's media market, but I freelanced for decades and, while I never exactly prospered, I earned a fair living. In your case, a strong personal essay about your experiences in today's job market might be salable somewhere--newspaper, magazine, website? You'd surely have a lot of interested, sympathetic readers. That would be a start, and might also be therapeutic. I don't mean to minimize the difficulties, but I know from experience that just working toward a goal--writing and then trying to publish a good piece on life today as a well-qualified and thus-far-unemployed person--can help push back that helpless, aimless feeling that tends to set in sometimes. Gives you a goal, makes you feel as if you're moving ahead, etc. I wish you very good luck and hope that, very soon, this too shall pass.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 9:55 AM on June 25, 2010

How good are you and your SO at job applications? When I moved to the UK, learning how how to write an application took a while and some guidance from others. Like you, I have a non-useful degree, and am either over- or under- qualified for most things.

I was told by an HR person that when reviewing job applications, the process is brutally straightforward. The reviewer will go through the list of qualifications and experience desired, and tick them off. If all necessary qualifications and a good sprinkling of desirable qualifications are ticked, you'll be called for an interview. To make it easier for the reviewer, don't be afraid of using the words of the job advertisement when drafting your own application. Whether it's a resume format or a question/ answer application, make sure you address each point mentioned in the advertisement.

The second thing is how to frame your work/ education/ volunteer/ etc experience so that it matches the requirements of the post. This will require you to think creatively. Eg, if you were a member of a student organisation and in charge of the finances, voila, you have some budgetary experience. Etc. I find this especially difficult, because applying for jobs is such a soul-deadening experience. It helps if you have a small stock of stories to illustrate the most common application questions.

All of this is very different from the way employment works in my home country, and it was only after I learned these tricks that I started getting called for interviews.

(Apologies if this is all stuff you've thrashed through many times before or doesn't apply to the types of work you're looking for.)

You don't really have the time right now, but if things somehow work out so that you find yourself still in the UK and without work, you might wish to consider volunteering in an organisation in a role where you can build marketable skills. And, frankly, feel better about yourself.

Good luck. I hope it works out. I've been where you are, and it's miserable, but it will end one way or the other, and you'll move on.

And incidentally: would your language skills help you in the tourist industry in Brighton? Eg in pubs or hotels frequented by Italians.
posted by tavegyl at 9:58 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

Have you or your SO tried a temp agency? Not sure about UK specific, but there are lots in the U.S. and my past roommates have used them successfully.
posted by too bad you're not me at 10:10 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouch. That sounds like a rough situation to be in. First of all, I'd like to offer my support - you WILL get through this. You aren't sick and dying (I hope), you have an SO who loves you, you have your youth and you have a wonderful future ahead of you. Everything will all work out in the end.

Now, for some more practical advice. I have no idea how the UK system works, but is there any kind of social assistance that you can apply for? Don't feel ashamed if you need it - this is exactly what it is created for.

Alternate job possibilities. With skills in English writing, there are a lot of freelance jobs you can find. I second the advice above about writing freelance articles. There are a few websites I know of that may help. Demand Studios are the folks who do all the How To articles online. I know they are currently hiring writers in some areas. Elance is the popular site that was promoted by Tim Ferris in his 4 Hour Work Week book. A lot of these are drastically underpaid, but can help you build a portfolio.

Are there any former professors that you can chat with? Your former advisor probably wants you to suceed. Talk to them - they may have leads or insight on on-campus abilities. A former undergrad prof of mine (who I had just stopped in to kvetch with) had some grant funding and helped me out with a few part-time hours. Your advisor (or other profs) may know of someone who needs help with research.

Basic skills jobs - becoming a nanny is a great idea. You may also want to offer services such as tutoring in English or Italian or translating documents. In Canada, there are often jobs in apartment complexes for couples. These require gathering rent and being generally handy - the big advantage to this is that you get the apartment rent free.

Speaking of living arrangements; before you consider moving in with your parents, and if you have enough cash to move from place to place, I would highly recommend either wwoofing or workaways. In each case you get to travel around and exchange labour for room and board. Both sites are very welcoming to couples.

I hope this helps.
posted by valoius at 10:59 AM on June 25, 2010

It sounds like what you really need is money rather than a job. Here are a couple of ways I've made enough to live on in the UK without a job:

1. Buy books at car boot sales and charity shops and then resell them on Amazon. To check which books to buy, use your mobile phone and search for the ISBN numbers on Amazon. Choose the books that are going for a decent amount more than you'd have to pay for them and whose sales ranks are low.

2. Arbitrage betting and taking advantage of gambling introductory offer loopholes at the major bookies. Read the "step 1" thread on MoneySavingExpert.
posted by hazyjane at 11:06 AM on June 25, 2010

Does the university where you did your BA or your Masters off any type of career resources or alumni networking opportunities? Make sure you've exhausted all of those kinds of options.
posted by Meg_Murry at 11:18 AM on June 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

Echoing getting freelance work with your writing and language skills. Have you checked Craigslist for, say, translation work?

Also echoing reselling books on Amazon, as that's helped me when I was in a pinch in times past. Do you have anything you could take to a consignment shop or pawn?

There are a lot of people in your shoes right now all over the world, so don't feel bad!
posted by Anima Mundi at 11:28 AM on June 25, 2010

I don't see why you couldn't work in public relations? Surely there are many many PR agencies who would value your degree.
posted by anniecat at 11:40 AM on June 25, 2010

I second the idea of going with a temp agency. Your writing skills would be an asset in a number of temp positions -- heck, general computer competence would be an asset -- and although the pay isn't usually great, it's often better than McDonalds, and can be a good way to get your foot in the door with a company and establish a network of contacts.
posted by monkeymonkey at 11:44 AM on June 25, 2010

I agree with everyone above. You both should sign up with a temp agency. That has saved my life several times. You get to go to different places, try new things and it actually can be fun. One time I signed up with a medical temp agency, although I don't know how I got that idea because I have no medical training. But they had placements for me ALL the time. And I chose to take the night shift for higher pay. And I always got overtime if I wanted it. I ended up doing things like sitting by patients overnight in hospitals to either guard them from the staff or as a kind of suicide watch (paid by family that couldn't be there). Met some very interesting people there. And also I was hired to be a kind of "guard" for an autistic girl in a group foster home (she was getting 24 protection from sexual assault and also we had to keep her from running away because the doors could not be locked - fire hazard). This job assignment really changed my life in many ways.

I have also done office and factory temp jobs. The bottom line is they are VERY dependable, ironically. If you both sign up with temp agencies I am sure you will have steady income coming in to pay your rent.

I know it is kind of soul-killing to work crappy jobs when you are smart but that's the good thing about temp work because a lot of them are very anonymous and you won't run into people you know like you would at McDonalds.

Also fake it til you make it. If I were in your shoes, and I have been, I would get a temp job to pay the rent and then I would do my real work on the weekends and then when anyone asked me what I do I would not volunteer about the temp work I would say that I am a writer and give details about my latest project. It is no one's business that you were not born rich and that you have to work for a living.

If you sign up with a specialized temp agency or headhunter firm (if they don't charge a fee) you can get a lot of feedback of how you interview. So even if you don't get placed right away you can find out what you are doing wrong.

I also recommend inventory specialists. Here in the US I worked for RGIS inventory specialists. It starts out as a temp job but can quickly become full-time. We took inventory of all the local businesses and if you choose you can take assignments out of town taking the company van. I not only had great camaraderie with the people I worked with (a lot of people who do this are pretty smart) but I was chosen to work on the Virgin Island assignments which was kind of a reward because I was fast. And I learned a lot about business which helped me run 2 successful businesses later on.

As suggested above you could take care of children. But I would market myself as an educated nanny not a babysitter. Better yet an Italian immersion program. Where you offer to care for children but also tutor them in Italian. This would be perfect for a rich family planning a future move to Italy.

And about your parent's or your SO's parents or the unfairness of everything. Give that up today. Please. I have spent 1000s of hours of my life asking those same questions over and over. I wish I had that time back! Think of what I could have accomplished if I wrote or painted those thousands of hours!
posted by cda at 11:58 AM on June 25, 2010 [2 favorites]

Temp agencies will definitely have work for you, it will most likely be telemarketing if office based, or factory work , but there will be something. I am going through exactly the same problem in Reading, it is exceptionally demoralising, MeMail me if you want a chat.
posted by ellieBOA at 12:51 PM on June 25, 2010

Depending on your circumstances you can still claim benefits if you're not a UK national. Go to your local Citizen's Advice Bureau to get full advice on what you can claim.

I know that you're looking for work, but if you can claim benefits it will stave off having to move in with parents while you look.
posted by Coobeastie at 2:27 PM on June 25, 2010

In the Uk we don't have telecommuting or Craigslist, and I believe nannies have to be trained/registered, but I could be wrong. Tutoring could well be an option though - there must be some wealthy families in Brighton.

PR and freelancing are great suggestions but, based on the experiences of friends getting into both, very tough to get into right now, so maybe not an instant income.
posted by mippy at 3:01 PM on June 25, 2010

When I lived in Brighton, I worked with A temp agency called Select. They appear to be out of business now, but there are plenty of others. I got a job doing data entry for SEEBOARD. It was the sort of work that a trained monkey or cleverly programmed button-pushing robot could do, but the people I worked with were nice enough. It seemed like they were the type of company that was always in need of extra help in this department.

I would reiterate the suggestions above that you try to market your writing or language skills. There are other sites for translators besides eLance. You could also start a blog on a topic you are interested in and then approach a well-known blog or blog network about writing for them for pay. That's probably never going to amount to much money, but you will be keeping your skills honed, making something concrete that you can point to later and quite possibly earning some publicity.

You could also try WWOOFing, although the SO might complicate things. That would at least take care of your room and board until you find a proper job.

Best of luck.
posted by HE Amb. T. S. L. DuVal at 2:25 AM on June 26, 2010

Another vote for Demand Studios. I've done some writing for them. While it's not my best writing, and not anything that's made me a lot of money, it's a good fall back to have. If you could write 3-4 articles a day, that's like 45-60 dollars (US). Enough to pay down some bills and give you some breathing room. Mefi mail me if you want any more info on how to get started.
posted by Rocket26 at 7:26 AM on June 26, 2010

what about interpreting agencies - if I understand correctly, you're fluent in English and Italian? Just try googling for agencies locally, from my experience/my friends' experience it is quite easy to pick up some temping work which is healthcare-related. The pay is usually pretty crap but some agencies don't really require you to have much if any experience, just a suggestion.
posted by coffee_monster at 12:06 PM on June 26, 2010