How do I find self-fulfillment at work without bringing down everyone else?
June 5, 2010 2:07 PM Subscribe
Am I too considerate or am I a cold-hearted jerk? Work and work-relationship-related question inside...
I have always put my heart and soul into my work - I work in product development and tend to treat each project as if it were my own baby, and therefore I work as hard as I can to make my work the best that it can be. I don't just do as I am told - I do more. And if I have ideas that will make the end result better, I communicate them. If I don't agree with something, I express it (respectfully!). This philosphy has worked relatively well for me because managers see that I care about the product and the company.
However I always worked alone on projects, so no one was directly affected by my enthusiasm.
Now I have been at this new company for about 15 months, but here, the philosphy is different. Basically everyone does what the project manager tells them, no more, no less, no questions asked.
I am getting antsy and I have radical ideas that will completely change our product and the way we work. I have expressed these ideas to my managers and they are excited about them, but they want me to include and lead my coworkers in this process.
I would have no problem including them and leading them, but there are a few problems:
- I don't think they want to be led, let alone by me (I mean, how can I know more then they?)
- They seem resistant to change and I am worried that I am pushing them to do something that they don't want to (I mean, this is my idea, after all)
When I talk to them, I try to share all my ideas, and say that that this is "our" project, and they're all fine with that, but the problem is that I am the one thinking of everything and doing everything, so is it really "our" project?
Another problem is that their work really does suck. I mean, it's really bad. I'm sorry if I sound like an a$$ . So there's this other worry, that I am making them look bad when I submit my work. So then I end up giving them credit for things they didn't do, and that isn't fair to me.
How do I be all that I can be, when that potentially involves pi$$ing off others or exposing them for the amateurs that they are? Or is this a plate of beans that I am overthinking?
I have always put my heart and soul into my work - I work in product development and tend to treat each project as if it were my own baby, and therefore I work as hard as I can to make my work the best that it can be. I don't just do as I am told - I do more. And if I have ideas that will make the end result better, I communicate them. If I don't agree with something, I express it (respectfully!). This philosphy has worked relatively well for me because managers see that I care about the product and the company.
However I always worked alone on projects, so no one was directly affected by my enthusiasm.
Now I have been at this new company for about 15 months, but here, the philosphy is different. Basically everyone does what the project manager tells them, no more, no less, no questions asked.
I am getting antsy and I have radical ideas that will completely change our product and the way we work. I have expressed these ideas to my managers and they are excited about them, but they want me to include and lead my coworkers in this process.
I would have no problem including them and leading them, but there are a few problems:
- I don't think they want to be led, let alone by me (I mean, how can I know more then they?)
- They seem resistant to change and I am worried that I am pushing them to do something that they don't want to (I mean, this is my idea, after all)
When I talk to them, I try to share all my ideas, and say that that this is "our" project, and they're all fine with that, but the problem is that I am the one thinking of everything and doing everything, so is it really "our" project?
Another problem is that their work really does suck. I mean, it's really bad. I'm sorry if I sound like an a$$ . So there's this other worry, that I am making them look bad when I submit my work. So then I end up giving them credit for things they didn't do, and that isn't fair to me.
How do I be all that I can be, when that potentially involves pi$$ing off others or exposing them for the amateurs that they are? Or is this a plate of beans that I am overthinking?
It's OK to ask your managers for mentoring, or even outside training, on leadership in a corporate setting. It's not something that comes naturally to most, and it's a skill set that can be, to some extent, nurtured.
posted by availablelight at 2:21 PM on June 5, 2010
posted by availablelight at 2:21 PM on June 5, 2010
I have expressed these ideas to my managers and they are excited about them, but they want me to include and lead my coworkers in this process.
Really it's up to your managers to dictate how the other employees will be involved in the process. Organizing and overseeing your peers is (probably) not your job -- and you can bet that they know this, and are certain to resist your leadership.
It also could be that your managers are grateful for your enthusiasm but are just humoring you when it comes to your ideas.
posted by hermitosis at 2:27 PM on June 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
Really it's up to your managers to dictate how the other employees will be involved in the process. Organizing and overseeing your peers is (probably) not your job -- and you can bet that they know this, and are certain to resist your leadership.
It also could be that your managers are grateful for your enthusiasm but are just humoring you when it comes to your ideas.
posted by hermitosis at 2:27 PM on June 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
"us" isn't necessarily offensive. In every communication about the work that comes out of our team, no matter if I was in a leadership role or a peon role, I say "we" and "us". It keeps everything neutral but familial, egos-at-the-door kind of thing. Everyone is included and it avoids the impression of power tripping.
I will use "I" - if I screw up I'll take ownership. And I'll praise great contributors by name at the end of a project, but otherwise it's all communal.
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 2:30 PM on June 5, 2010
I will use "I" - if I screw up I'll take ownership. And I'll praise great contributors by name at the end of a project, but otherwise it's all communal.
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 2:30 PM on June 5, 2010
You've been at the company for 15 months--everybody knows you're talented. You don't need to keep proving it. You don't need to keep accumulating "credit" in your cube. At this point, giving some of that credit to others is basically win-win all around. They win because you're making them feel good, and you win because people will be more enthusiastic about supporting your ideas.
posted by mpls2 at 2:42 PM on June 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by mpls2 at 2:42 PM on June 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
How are you giving other people credit? There's a difference between presenting your individual work as "our group's" versus "my co-worker John Smith's." The former seems fine to me but the latter does not. You shouldn't feel the need to give particular people credit for things they didn't actually do--and they might not even want you to, in the event that it ends up backfiring ("John Smith did this project? He left a typo in there!").
The old guard is probably used to coasting by on really bad work because they've been getting away with it. Now you're on the scene working your ass off (at least in comparison), and they might resent you for it. They might see your ideas as the grown-up version of a teacher forgetting to assign homework until a kid in the class raises his hand and asks for it, ruining everyone else's play time. It will probably piss them off. (Not that they would be justified, but they could make the atmosphere at work not so nice.)
posted by sallybrown at 3:03 PM on June 5, 2010
The old guard is probably used to coasting by on really bad work because they've been getting away with it. Now you're on the scene working your ass off (at least in comparison), and they might resent you for it. They might see your ideas as the grown-up version of a teacher forgetting to assign homework until a kid in the class raises his hand and asks for it, ruining everyone else's play time. It will probably piss them off. (Not that they would be justified, but they could make the atmosphere at work not so nice.)
posted by sallybrown at 3:03 PM on June 5, 2010
Can you ask the managers if it would be o.k. to take the project to point x by yourself (stating whatever reasons you need)? Then, when it is established, the roles needed to continue will be more established as well, and you can give certain people certain tasks that will be easier for them to do, as it sounds like they aren't really go-getters. And, at that point, your managers should be able to take on that delegation task.
posted by Vaike at 5:02 PM on June 5, 2010
posted by Vaike at 5:02 PM on June 5, 2010
You should be driving hard for a raise and a promotion, even if you don't need or care about the money. If you don't get it, quit. It's very easy for managers in this situation to pat you on the head, congratulate you on your brilliance and then suggest something basically impossible. Giving out ego massages costs them nothing, and they're hoping this is what you're really after and will soon give up.
You should come up with a new title and job description that formalizes your new leadership & product vision responsibilities. People don't value what they get for free, so you should also go for a raise. Make it clear that you don't expect this immediately, and you are willing to prove yourself, so propose a set of milestones over 6-12 months, including one or two pilot projects to validate your approach with well-defined criteria for success and failure. If you have yearly performance reviews, this is where to do this. This sounds all business-y, but the real reason for doing this is that they don't want all your peers coming to them complaining that it's not fair, they've been here twice as long as you and also demanding more responsibility, they need a reason to say yes to you and no to them, so you need to do something here that your peers can't do.
After you've achieved the milestones you've agreed to, you'll set up a meeting with your supervisors and they'll most likely tell you how impressive your work is and how everyone loves it, but with the economy where it is right now, blah blah blah, they can't really afford to give you a promotion, but they definitely want you to keep doing what you're doing! But the real reason is that they like the way things are just fine, the project manager has started seeing you as a rival and they are worried about creating dissatisfaction & envy among the ranks by promoting you. They were just hoping you'd give up or fail.
At this point, you should quit immediately--you have a a job offer in your back pocket because in the weeks leading up to this meeting, you interviewed at other companies for positions with the responsibilities you want, using the experience you've acquired over the last year, knowing in advance that they might pull this kind of thing.
To be frank, I think the method of giving a lot of (fake) credit to your peers to make them feel better is pretty patronizing. They're not that stupid, there's no way of secretly getting what you want without them noticing and possibly being offended because it exposes the fact that they're less talented than you. Either they're cool with it and you should just go for the promotion, or they're not and you should leverage your current situation to get a better position at another company. Although, one possible strategy is to try to get one or more of your other peers promoted or recognized for something other than what you're trying to get promoted for, and approach it like a generalized career advancement program for your peers, rather than you getting special treatment.
posted by AlsoMike at 9:03 PM on June 5, 2010 [3 favorites]
You should come up with a new title and job description that formalizes your new leadership & product vision responsibilities. People don't value what they get for free, so you should also go for a raise. Make it clear that you don't expect this immediately, and you are willing to prove yourself, so propose a set of milestones over 6-12 months, including one or two pilot projects to validate your approach with well-defined criteria for success and failure. If you have yearly performance reviews, this is where to do this. This sounds all business-y, but the real reason for doing this is that they don't want all your peers coming to them complaining that it's not fair, they've been here twice as long as you and also demanding more responsibility, they need a reason to say yes to you and no to them, so you need to do something here that your peers can't do.
After you've achieved the milestones you've agreed to, you'll set up a meeting with your supervisors and they'll most likely tell you how impressive your work is and how everyone loves it, but with the economy where it is right now, blah blah blah, they can't really afford to give you a promotion, but they definitely want you to keep doing what you're doing! But the real reason is that they like the way things are just fine, the project manager has started seeing you as a rival and they are worried about creating dissatisfaction & envy among the ranks by promoting you. They were just hoping you'd give up or fail.
At this point, you should quit immediately--you have a a job offer in your back pocket because in the weeks leading up to this meeting, you interviewed at other companies for positions with the responsibilities you want, using the experience you've acquired over the last year, knowing in advance that they might pull this kind of thing.
To be frank, I think the method of giving a lot of (fake) credit to your peers to make them feel better is pretty patronizing. They're not that stupid, there's no way of secretly getting what you want without them noticing and possibly being offended because it exposes the fact that they're less talented than you. Either they're cool with it and you should just go for the promotion, or they're not and you should leverage your current situation to get a better position at another company. Although, one possible strategy is to try to get one or more of your other peers promoted or recognized for something other than what you're trying to get promoted for, and approach it like a generalized career advancement program for your peers, rather than you getting special treatment.
posted by AlsoMike at 9:03 PM on June 5, 2010 [3 favorites]
I had a lot of thoughts to post....
but instead, AlsoMike +1.
posted by mikel at 10:23 PM on June 5, 2010
but instead, AlsoMike +1.
posted by mikel at 10:23 PM on June 5, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
Have your managers explicitly communicated to your coworkers (i.e., not just to you) that A) they are excited about your ideas, and B) that they are deputizing you (for lack of a better term) to lead the charge? Because it sounds like in this particular workplace culture, your coworkers have no particular reason/instinct/incentive to get on board with these changes unless it's made clear to them that your managers expect them to get on board and contribute.
posted by scody at 2:21 PM on June 5, 2010