I hate dancing. My friends hate that I hate dancing.
April 22, 2010 9:01 PM Subscribe
I hate dancing at bars and nightclubs. How do I help my friends understand this without being a party pooper?
posted by windbox to Human Relations (27 answers total) 15 users marked this as a favorite
I hate dancing in nightclubs. It's not that I don't know how to or that I'm a bad dancer (I've been told I'm pretty good) - but I feel nothing but extreme discomfort and anxiety when I dance. So I have made the decision not to dance anymore. And sorry dance-lovers, but this question isn't about getting me to appreciate the spirit of dance. I really, really just don't want to dance anymore.
The problem is that no one else seems to tolerate this decision. Every time I go out bar-hopping with a big group of friends, at some point in the night someone suggests "WE SHOULD GO SOMEWHERE AND DANCE!" and everyone else agrees while a wave of nausea and panic comes over me. We'll finally arrive and people are VERY INSISTENT that I dance and try to drag me onto the dance floor: "Comme onnn...just danceee!!!"
I know that they are doing it because they genuinely want me to have fun with them but I don't think they realize how much stress it causes me. So when I politely decline and explain that I'd rather not dance, it's like I'm playing hard to get and they want me to dance even MORE. "Dude just do it! Just make a fool of yourself, no one's watching!" This does not help.
I don't know how to explain to them that I just feel really stressed and uncomfortable dancing and I really, really, really don't like it... but it seems so hard to do without coming off like a party pooper who takes himself too seriously, especially when everyone's just trying to have a good time. I've thought about simply splitting from the group when they decide to hit the dance club, but again, this would leave them very confused because we're all close friends and the action would be taken as buzzkill-ish (and it's usually too early to go home anyway).
Non-dancers, how do you deal with people who belong to the evangelical church of dance and are constantly trying to convert you?