Cravings for cigaretts and masturbating

April 14, 2010 7:11 PM

Can you compare the craving someone gets for a cigarette to the craving to masturbate?

I just want to know if the two are similar. I'm 16 and i masturbate almost every day (its hormones, cmon). If im forced to stop, like if we go on vacation or we have people staying over. I usually get that really horny feeling on the third day. If i go for like 5 days, i get a sick feeling from not going for so long. Then when i finally go, i get a huge overwhelming relief feeling.

Can that go along the lines of someone with cigarettes and cravings? Same feelings just replace arousal with nicotine.

Just wondering. What do you think?

posted by anonymous to science & nature (19 answers total)

You can compare anything you like! I think there's a little difference between a chemical dependence and a sexual urges, but really you'd need to talk to a neuroscientist.
posted by BusyBusyBusy at 7:18 PM on April 14, 2010

Leaving masturbation alone for five days as a 16 year old would be torture. I'd imagine it's worse than giving up smokes :)
posted by honey-barbara at 7:19 PM on April 14, 2010

The craving to smoke is not similar. It is worst for the first few days when you quit, and after that it becomes easier to deal with. At least, that is how it worked for me when I quit smoking.
posted by twblalock at 7:32 PM on April 14, 2010

Dude, they're not even remotely comparable. The worst that happens to guys who stop masturbating for awhile is that they can get a little cranky.

When you stop smoking, your body fucking screams out for that shit - you get headaches, chills, weird changes in mood and all kinds of unpleasant effects until you feed the addiction. It's pure hell, and that's why it's so hard to quit.
posted by Despondent_Monkey at 7:36 PM on April 14, 2010 [4 favorites]

Your dependence/reliance on daily masturbation is mostly age (& gender?) related. That's completely different from addiction cravings (including sexual/behavioral addiction/compulsion).

In essence: your cravings are normal & natural, with your body biochemically "leading you to the water"; addiction cravings are anxiety-driven (more like the whip than the halter-lead).

FWIW: I was the same as a teen. NBD.
posted by IAmBroom at 7:46 PM on April 14, 2010

I don't think they are similar, speaking as someone who has both masturbated and been addicted to smoking (and quit).

But hey, everybody is different. I don't think you should feel bad about it, but if you do, maybe you should think about seeing a therapist you are comfortable enough talking to about it?
posted by dubitable at 7:50 PM on April 14, 2010

I should add that it's completely normal for a 16-year old male to want to masturbate every day, or even multiple times per day. I personally think that the time from 14-16 was the height of my libido - I'm now in my early twenties and I've never felt as ridiculously horny as I did back then. This kind of thing will 'normalize' as you get older, so I wouldn't worry.

Smoking, on the other hand - I was addicted for three years and was able to mostly quit. I'm down to two cigars a month, but considering that I was smoking like a pack a day at the height of my addiction, I think a couple cigars now and then is a pretty big improvement. If you haven't started, don't. You get sick a lot more and quitting is hell, like I described above.
posted by Despondent_Monkey at 7:57 PM on April 14, 2010

"If im forced to stop, like if we go on vacation or we have people staying over."

You still shower alone, don't you?
posted by Jacqueline at 8:06 PM on April 14, 2010

You still shower alone, don't you?

Some guys (I'm guessing the OP included) don't like masturbating in the shower.
posted by kylej at 8:21 PM on April 14, 2010

You can quit smoking. You can never quit masturbating.

Seriously though, you will get less horny as you get older, and will be able to keep it under control. Plus you can only pop your cork so many times a day. Smoking is totally different. Don't start smoking to find out -- it's a nightmare to quit. Your brain actually thinks differently, rationalizes to get its hands on the next ciggy, your moods change, etc. (Ex-smoker here.)
posted by teedee2000 at 8:26 PM on April 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

The craving is actually similar. There could be a hyper-physiological aspect to craving for drugs like nicotine and cocaine that stimulate the "reward" system in ways that "natural" rewards like sex do not because it wasn't designed for those levels of chemicals-- but it appears that you can nonetheless achieve that level of craving even with a "natural" reward like junk food (see here) so I don't see why the craving level wouldn't potentially be the same for a natural reward like sex, especially for a young man of your age.

Craving has many elements-- the vast majority of people are not addicts of any type. For those plagued by overwhelming desire to have sex, take drugs or do anything else despite negative consequences (the fundamental definition of addiction), there is usually something else-- not just desire for pleasure-- that drives them.

So, those rats who became junk food "addicts" in the article I link-- they were basically under extreme stress from being isolated. If you were to be locked in solitary at your age, you might develop an overwhelming masturbation "addiction" simply because you had no other outlet for pleasure or stress relief. But that wouldn't mean you were forever a "sex addict."

However, if you were kept in that situation forever, you might well be. Addiction is complicated, basically.
posted by Maias at 8:27 PM on April 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

Smoking is infinitely more satisfying.
posted by jeffamaphone at 8:46 PM on April 14, 2010

Jeffamaphone is joking. (I hope!)

I'm an ex-smoker and I think the feeling that builds up when you're unable to fulfill your desire is similar. However, if you don't get a cigarette, your body isn't going to make up for it in your sleep.
posted by zinfandel at 8:52 PM on April 14, 2010

Zinfandel: You forgot wish-fulfilment dreams. Last time I quit (ha) I had satisfying dreams of smoking. My smoking addiction is unfortunately tied to a sense of well-being.

Once a day is good for you, and don't miss too many days. When I was in my teens and most of my twenties, taking care of that was a hygiene routine. Without it, thoughts of sex were too intrusive in the day. With it, mostly controlable. Even in my early 50's now, I get off one way or the other more days than not.

In my early smoking days, the relief of smoking was much more similar to masturbation, mostly because smoking included the freedom to sneak away somewhere to do it, so being alone was part of that reward. My family life was bad, so alone time was highly valued.
posted by Goofyy at 9:11 PM on April 14, 2010

Seriously though, you will get less horny as you get older,

Or maybe not. I'm a woman in my 30s who's had at least one orgasm a day starting when I was around 15 or 16. I lost count of how many Conair Touch and Tones I've worn out over the years... these days, an orgasm helps me relax before I go to sleep at night and puts the glow in my cheeks when I wake up in the morning.

What's there to be embarrassed about? Anyone who criticizes someone for coming too much is uptight, not worth listening to, and could probably stand to have a few more orgasms themselves.
posted by aquafortis at 11:02 PM on April 14, 2010

If im forced to stop, like if we go on vacation or we have people staying over. I usually get that really horny feeling on the third day.

Smoking is just like that. Except you don't get horny. You get homicidal. After about at max an hour.

And it just gets worse from there. And then your throat tickles. And then you can't think. Of anything except that every noise and every person annoys the ever-lovin' fuck out of of you. And you want a goddamn cigarette.

Nothing like the urge to wank.
posted by orthogonality at 12:37 AM on April 15, 2010 [2 favorites]

Don't stop wanking. (For you good and ours.)
Don't start smoking. (Same reasons.)
posted by Drasher at 6:03 AM on April 15, 2010

When I was trying to quit smoking, I was constantly around other people who smoked, and that made it harder to stop (I eventually did). There was smoking at the bus stop, at restaurants, at bars....

I generally don't run across people masturbating in the normal course of my day.
posted by desjardins at 7:45 AM on April 15, 2010

Not comparable.

In addition to the above, being outrageously horny is kind of pleasant. Not desperately wanting a cigarette.
posted by kestrel251 at 3:16 PM on April 15, 2010