Sexy time photo, privately?

March 10, 2010 1:46 PM

Best way to get nude photos printed?

I would like to take some nude photos of myself to give to my S.O. How could I get them printed? Typically, if I want to print a digital photo, I upload it to the Walgreens website and pick up prints there, but, would they even print these sorts of photos? And I don't like the idea of having my neighborhood Walgreens people see them...

I know that I can email them to S.O., or put them on his computer, but he may be sans computer at the time I would like to do this. Don't quite want him viewing them at work! What's the best way to go about this?

posted by anonymous to grab bag (28 answers total)

Home Printer+Nice Photo Paper

Walgreen's and stores like that will not print them or will ask you to not print there ever again in my experience.
posted by French Fry at 1:48 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Buy a photo printer. Seriously. Do you want to risk having a photo of your naked self anywhere in public otherwise?
posted by meerkatty at 1:48 PM on March 10, 2010

This classic Straight Dope question has been overtaken by technology--I agree with everybody else. Buy a decent photo printer and some great paper.
posted by box at 1:50 PM on March 10, 2010

You can call ahead to see what the policy is on nudes. Do NOT send to Walgreens or other big chains, or you're asking for extra "personal" copies to be made by a creeper behind the counter, or even uploaded somewhere online. If you MUST have these printed by a lab, instead of on a personal printer at home, use a professional lab.
posted by availablelight at 1:53 PM on March 10, 2010

I used to work for Walgreens and I saw nude photos fairly often. Officially, we are supposed to shred them and refund you. Unofficially, we sold one copy to the customer and kept another in the store photo album. Neither of those situations is ideal.

A serious photo studio will develop your photos without judging you or violating your privacy, but good luck finding one of those.
posted by modernserf at 1:53 PM on March 10, 2010 [3 favorites]

What about one of those kiosks in CVS/Walgreens/etc? Yes it's still "in public," but absent a photo printer it's the best you're gonna get.
posted by jckll at 1:54 PM on March 10, 2010

What about getting him a digital photo frame and loading the pics on there? Cheaper than a photo printer.
posted by Metroid Baby at 1:55 PM on March 10, 2010 [2 favorites]

(Incidentally, I've known a few people who worked at independent photo shops. Let me assure you that both Mom-and-Pop local businesses and serious photo studios are perfectly capable of making personal copies and maintaining store photo albums.)
posted by box at 1:56 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

The local Rite-Aid here has a self-serve machine that prints photos. Walgreens may have something similar. So you can print photos without involving an employee in the loop, although you may want to go when the store is relatively empty so that nobody happens to glance over your shoulder at the thumbnail-sized pictures on the screen.

There's no reasonable reason for that machine to store a local copy of your photo after you're done, but personally I wouldn't take the chance with nude photos; I'd go for buying a photo printer or borrowing one from a friend. Caveat emptor.
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 1:57 PM on March 10, 2010

I had a photo book printed through Apple with nude (but not sexually explicit) photos. There were no problems and the book turned out great.
posted by ColdChef at 2:00 PM on March 10, 2010

Definitely a photo printer. In the event you don't shop for tech stuff often, you may be amazed at how shockingly inexpensive photo printers are these days. Really, considering the cost ratio of developing prints commercially to buying your own printer, it's really a no-brainer if privacy is an issue.
posted by Adam_S at 2:03 PM on March 10, 2010

It seems like there would be an online service that would specialize in doing this sort of thing-- I'm surprised no one knows of any.
posted by NoraReed at 2:08 PM on March 10, 2010

Um...what about Flickr? You can do so via their 'create and organize' interface, via snapfish I think. Granted, I'm not sure where the people are in this equation, but presumably someone somewhere is handling the photos. However, at least you can keep your photos private on Flickr.

Alternatively...do like others have suggested, get your own printer + high quality photo paper. Good quality photo paper can really improve the quality a lot.
posted by dubitable at 2:16 PM on March 10, 2010

Those photo printers do make really nice prints, but they are kind of a ripoff. The ink is crazy expensive, and the cartridges dry up if you don't use them. I don't know if I would want to spend that much money on a one-off thing. But they can be pretty cheap.
posted by delmoi at 2:31 PM on March 10, 2010

You could also buy a photo printer at Target or Walmart, use it, then return it. Many stores have very liberal return policies.
posted by gnutron at 2:40 PM on March 10, 2010

To be a little more specific: you should know that you can pay less than $100 for a photo printer that produces fine prints if you use good paper nowadays. You should also know that printers have shifted in sort of an odd direction: at this point, printers are often cheaper than the ink that they're filled will. So you might in future pay $80 a pop to completely refill it with ink every time. Sub-$100 printers almost always (in my experience) come with a free set of ink cartridges.

So, keeping all this in mind, it may be a good idea to just pick up a printer. For some people, $80-$90 is a great price to pay to print off a few photos privately, and you might have some use for the printer in the future, too. For others, it makes more financial sense to simply find a discreet out-of-the-way photo shop which they feel they can trust.
posted by koeselitz at 3:03 PM on March 10, 2010

cheaper than the ink they're filled with
posted by koeselitz at 3:04 PM on March 10, 2010

koeselitz writes "Sub-$100 printers almost always (in my experience) come with a free set of ink cartridges."

Note however that the cartridges that come with printers are rarely the same size as the refills.
posted by Mitheral at 3:30 PM on March 10, 2010

Sending the picture in computer-readable form is insanely stupid.

True enough, but all photos are pretty easily scannable. I'd bet anyone dickish enough to put photos online in the first place would probably be willing to scan non-digital ones. A bit more pre-meditated, I guess, but still.

Go with a photo printer. Generally, it's a good idea to keep the loop of people with access to your nudes at a minimum.
posted by graventy at 3:33 PM on March 10, 2010

it's not like the physical pictures can't be scanned. sending naked pictures of yourself is a matter of trust and something people should consider outside of the fog of love for the often post relationship. i think the OP is plenty able to suss out those issues and doesn't really need the tsk,tsk side conversation.

now - on to the question. if you give your pictures to anyone else to print, the chances are high that who ever that is will keep a copy. hell, i worked at a mall photo place and i have a collection of hilarious family pictures of people who were shitty to me - so it's not even just nude pictures.

print them yourself.
posted by nadawi at 3:35 PM on March 10, 2010

Any professional photo developing shop will print them for you, no questions asked.
posted by digividal at 3:58 PM on March 10, 2010

>>I know that I can email them to S.O., or put them on his computer

I don't know what your SO's work situation is, but I wouldn't send nude pictures to his computer for any reason: Lots & lots of companies have strict policies against that sort of thing. I've known several people fired from their jobs for having nude photos on their computer. Only one of them was stupid enough to go into IT and say "can you get these pics off my computer."* The other two had computer issues & IT "stumbled" across private photos while fixing completely unrelated things. And erasing files is rarely as complete as we think it is.

*He kept finding stuff he hadn't put on his computer, so he took it to IT and said, Houston, we have a security breach: Do something about it. And PS, please get this nastiness OFF my computer. Apparently they decided not to believe him when he said someone else put them there and fired him.
posted by Ys at 6:27 PM on March 10, 2010

Tinyprints.com does really excellent quality printing and *probably* doesn't have any compunctions about what they print. I don't think Shutterfly has some rules around obscenety, but your photos may not cross that line. I believe they tend to care (much) more about minors or threatening/risky scenes.
posted by pkingdesign at 8:34 PM on March 10, 2010

Walmart and Kinko's have self-service kiosks. The Kinko's might be a better bet, as you just slide a pre-paid card into the system so there's no chance of a clerk asking to see your prints.

And it depends on how the store is laid out, but I'd bet you'd have a better chance of having more privacy at Kinko's if there aren't any customers around at the time. Just make sure to surround them with decoy images in case someone wanders too close.

In terms of cost-per-print it probably isn't a great value, but I'm guessing convenience is more of a concern in this case. (Well, unless you have lots and lots of nude photos...)
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 9:40 PM on March 10, 2010

[a few comments removed - question is about printing, not relationship advice, thanks.]
posted by jessamyn at 9:53 PM on March 10, 2010

A serious photo studio will develop your photos without judging you or violating your privacy, but good luck finding one of those.

Oh dear, there's some touching naivety right there. I know people who've worked in high-end pro labs and at least some of the staff as as happy to enjoy customer photos as hour developer places.

If you want to be sure that he's the only person who gets your prints (unless he betrays that trust) your own photo printer is the only good option.

it's not like the physical pictures can't be scanned.

True, but there's more effort, and you can't accidentally share them when you send your laptop hard drive back for warranty replacement without doing a proper secure wipe of the drive (for example).
posted by rodgerd at 11:27 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I think the digital photo frame as a gift with the nudes of you pre-loaded is an excellent idea. He can take the pics off and put them on his personal computer if Mom and Dad come to visit, etc.

You could find a "boudoir" photographer to take them for you, which of course means you would need to be comfortable posing nude for someone else. There are women who do this as well as men, so that might help you decide if you are modest. Pro: flattering, excellent quality photos. Cons: probably cost more than the photo printer unless you have contacts that can help you out.

So, last option, photo printer.
posted by misha at 11:28 PM on March 10, 2010

Photo printer photo printer photo printer.

Whilst you're there getting the printer, pick up a USB stick and download a copy of truecrypt so you can safely store them.

Maybe a little paranoid but definitely reduces the chances of seeing your naked self on the internet.
posted by fullerine at 9:58 PM on April 6, 2010