Grandparents that ignore granddaughter: how to deal?
February 20, 2010 8:16 AM Subscribe
How do I deal with my child coming in last with her grandparents?
posted by tigerjade to human relations (49 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
My sister lives nearer to my parents (we're about 15 min away, they're less than 5), works with them, and they are constantly caring for her two kids. When we want our child to spend some time with her grandparents, there's always an excuse while they either can't do it or can't do it for very long, so she only sees them when we can schedule it far in advance and they don't cancel, or when we go to their church, where we'll see them for about 2 minutes. My sister and her family vacation with my parents; I only find out about the vacation after the fact.
I've always known, but have had trouble accepting, that I'm just not a priority with my parents, but I don't know what to do when my daughter starts to notice that her cousins have a much closer relationship to her grandparents than she does.
I'm trying to remedy this issue with my parents but I've tried for years and years, get the same apologies and promises to change, followed by absolutely zero follow-through; they just don't see me and my family as a priority anywhere approaching my sister and her family.
How do I deal with this when it comes up? How do you explain to a child that her neglect from her grandparents has nothing to do with her as an individual and has everything to do with her mother?