Either or too
January 8, 2010 9:20 AM   Subscribe

Can I use "Me either" in place of "Me too" in response to this statement..."I can't wait to see you!"? Please explain.
posted by likeapen to Writing & Language (18 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
I might say "me neither" as in "Neither can I [wait to see you]". Since "neither" means not one thing or the other, I read it like: neither you nor I can wait to see each other. I would not use "either" since that would mean only one of two.

In short, you can use it and be understood, but it's colloquial.
posted by paulg at 6:06 AM on January 9, 2010


Me neither would sound better to my ears, because you're responding to a negative (not wait.)
posted by Ruki at 9:22 AM on January 8, 2010


Unless you mean, "I can't wait to see me as well!"
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 9:25 AM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]


Me neither: neither you nor I can wait to see each other. (works)

Me either: Either you or I cannot wait to see each other (doesn't make sense)

Me too: Both you and I cannot wait to see each other. (works)
posted by melissasaurus at 9:31 AM on January 8, 2010


This is an idiomatic usage in some parts of the US. By the rules of English grammar, it should be, as Ruki says, "Me neither" because what you're saying is "I, also, can't wait."

However, like "I could care less," this is one of those things where an ungrammatical idiomatic usage exists.

In my youth in rural Massachusetts, "Me either" would have been absolutely the most common response to "I can't wait to see you." Another thing I heard a lot was "I went to the movies this weekend!" "So didn't I!" where the second speaker did, in fact, go to the movies.

I got out of the habit of using confusing idioms like this when I went to college and had roommates for whom English was a second (or fourth, in one case) language. Teaching ESL and ghostwriting grammar textbooks killed them forever in my idiolect.

But if the person you're going to say it to will understand it, let a hundred flowers bloom! But be aware it is going to confuse the fuck out of people who aren't familiar with the usage.
posted by Sidhedevil at 9:32 AM on January 8, 2010


My preferred response, if you care about being grammatically correct, would be "neither can I." Of course, if you yourself are the object of the awaited seeing, you'll need to turn the statement around: "neither can I wait to see you." Too bad that sounds so awkward. Solution: "Likewise" or "the feeling is mutual."
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 9:33 AM on January 8, 2010


"I went to the movies this weekend!" "So didn't I!"

o.O


Also, the preferred pronunciation of "didn't" was /diʔn̩/ (glottal stop instead of the second "d", no "t" at the end). I have no idea how the exchange students understood anything.
posted by Sidhedevil at 9:40 AM on January 8, 2010


Not for nothing, but I've never heard 'so didn't I' in my life. See what I did there? 'Me either' is pretty common here, in Philadelphia.
posted by fixedgear at 9:43 AM on January 8, 2010


I am a woman. I did not make that up. It was a common usage in central and western Massachusetts in the 1970s-1980s, which is probably why you didn't hear it in Philadelphia. People from west of 495 thought a trip into Boston was like the Lewis and Clark Expedition.
posted by Sidhedevil at 10:01 AM on January 8, 2010


For those who believe "So didn't I/so don't I" doesn't exist, here you go.
posted by Sidhedevil at 10:18 AM on January 8, 2010


Sidhedevil isn't lying - we said that on the south shore as well.
posted by moxiedoll at 10:24 AM on January 8, 2010


Mod note: A few comments removed, this is a fairly specific question.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:45 AM on January 8, 2010


I agree that "me either" is idiomatic, and possibly even more common, although I prefer the logical implications of "me neither" personally. I can't discount that part of this is the esthetic value of the "N" placed between two vowel sounds, though.

The "me too" response is perfectly grammatical and common, although I think it potentially comes across as childish in some contexts.

Short answer: You can.
posted by dhartung at 12:52 PM on January 8, 2010


When there is a negative in the first first statement, I would say "Me either" or "Neither *Verb* I."
I don't like liver. Me either or Neither do I.
I can't swim. Me either or Neither can I.

When there is no negative, I would say "me too" or "so *verb* I."
I love broccoli. Me too or So do I.
I can sing well. Me too or So can I.

I realize that me either and me too are grammatically incorrect, but I'm not Grammar Snob.
posted by Linnee at 3:39 PM on January 8, 2010


Hearing "me too" in response to something said affectionately grates on my ears like sandpaper. I had an ex-gf who said it, and it was hard for me not to wince. I heard it as "I, too, can't wait to see myself."

If she had said "me either," then I would have heard it as "I can't wait to see myself either," which would have been equally ridiculous.

Generally speaking, if you can't be bothered to enunciate "I can't wait to see you either," then you probably don't mean it. And abbreviating it with gramatically awkward phrases makes it sound like you mean it even less. But if you're really in a hurry, "likewise" at least makes sense.
posted by bingo at 4:32 PM on January 8, 2010


Generally speaking, if you can't be bothered to enunciate "I can't wait to see you either," then you probably don't mean it.

This is not a fair appraisal. Pedantry and emotional connection are not isomorphic, and projecting the grammatical formality with which casual social exchanges are enunciated onto someone's depth of feeling is a really poor idea.
posted by cortex at 7:55 AM on January 9, 2010


Pedantry and emotional connection are not isomorphic, and projecting the grammatical formality with which casual social exchanges are enunciated onto someone's depth of feeling is a really poor idea.

Fair enough. I'll rephrase.

If you can't be bothered to enunciate "I can't wait to see you either," then some people will assume that you don't mean it, and that even if you do, the sentiment is effectively negated by the way you speak.

Such people are always wrong. And yet, we are out there. Something to consider.
posted by bingo at 8:19 AM on January 9, 2010


From NY: have never heard "So didn't I' and if someone said it, would think they were trying to make some kind of joke.
posted by lsemel at 10:48 AM on January 9, 2010


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