Need inappropriate office party behaviors

November 9, 2009 7:29 AM

For Christmas Card art--what are some inappropriate workplace party behaviors that can be portrayed in a single drawing?

I'm working on having an artist do our company annual Christmas card, and this year we're doing a Far Side-ish cartoon of an inappropriate office party. For example, there will be someone Xeroxing their behind, and some people making out in the office supplies closet.

What other types of activities can be/should be included here? The funnier the better. But it can't be too involved, a single frame of someone "in the act" needs to convey the whole bit. But our artist is very very good, so if you have ideas, please post them and he might be able to make them work.

Thank you for ideas!

(and would a lampshade on a head be a workplace thing, or is that specifically a house party type behavior?)

posted by arniec to grab bag (25 comments total)

Any safety violations... grinding metal without safety glasses, using the top step of a ladder to change lightbulbs.
posted by odinsdream at 7:35 AM on November 9, 2009

Workplaces don't have lampshades. But I'm sure office workers can make creative Christmas accessories from office supplies.

You could make a good rickety tower out of office chairs (the kind without wheels) and then climb up it.

Something involving your actual product (or service) would be good but we don't know what it is.

If your workplace has ceiling fans those are good for swinging on. If you have any roof space accessible from windows people could get out onto it. If you have a water feature on the premises, bingo!

If you have any unusually enthusiastic employees they could be sitting and working while all this goes on around them.
posted by emilyw at 7:38 AM on November 9, 2009

Someone with their feet up on a desk, shoes off, socks on.

Three guys around the water cooler, oogling a female coworker who is wearing scanty clothing.

Someone spraying perfume or putting on makeup at their desk, or painting their nails while on the phone.

Someone browsing porn on a computer.

Group of women gossiping in a cubicle.
posted by strixus at 7:39 AM on November 9, 2009

That sounds like fun!

How about Naked Karaoke with Christmas ornaments blocking out the naughty bits?

Or Double Dipping.
posted by LuckySeven~ at 7:43 AM on November 9, 2009

Drunkenly telling off the boss. Drunkenly emailing problem clients. Double dipping the dip.

Also, I think the OP was talking specifically about office parties, not bad workplace behavior in general.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:46 AM on November 9, 2009

From real-life experience:

The boss dancing (very badly) on the table which was laden with food and booze. Messy and embarrassing.

The boss's wife wiggling some kind of long, phallic rubber party toy (I kid you not) between her breasts, then getting really apologetic -- "I've embarrassed you. I'm so sorry." Again and again, when I was basically too drunk to care either way.

People using food as ammunition in some kind of office bun-fight.

Worst. Office. Party. Ever.
posted by BrokenEnglish at 7:46 AM on November 9, 2009

How bout a group of employees playing craps in the corner...
somebody smoking a bong...
somebody pulling a prank on the boss that's way out of line - like graffiti-ing their office door.
posted by wundermint at 7:48 AM on November 9, 2009

Somebody spinning really fast in an office chair (flying food and/or vomit can be optional).
posted by dlugoczaj at 8:03 AM on November 9, 2009

Wet t-shirt contest.
Trashcan bonfire.
posted by mikesch at 8:08 AM on November 9, 2009

Someecards makes hilarious (free!) e-cards that highlight the "so-true-it's-awkward" parts of life. I'm having a hard time finding the right words to describe their brand of humor but it's pretty great, and perhaps there will be some inspiration there for you. If nothing else, it'll be good for a laugh.

Sounds like a fun project! Good luck!
posted by inatizzy at 8:12 AM on November 9, 2009

Stuffing a stocking from the supply closet.
posted by ferociouskitty at 8:12 AM on November 9, 2009 [1 favorite]

Playing light saber with fluorescent bulbs

Huffing toner

Handing out resumés
posted by CharlesV42 at 8:19 AM on November 9, 2009

Water cooler keg stand!
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:46 AM on November 9, 2009 [1 favorite]

Xeroxing your butt.
posted by Sweetie Darling at 8:48 AM on November 9, 2009

Unsteadily singing karaoke with a drink in one hand and the mic in the other, from atop a table, wearing a party hat. Needless to say, that scene from Bridget Jones' Diary continues to make me lol even when I'm not watching the movie. "Can't liiiiiive, if living is without youuuu! Can't LIIIIIIVE >screech<>
Making out with someone on one's desk.

I second the throwing up in a trash can.

It's hard to convey drunkenness in a sketch, however tiny little bubbles drawn around someone's head works well.

Tackling a Christmas tree, if you're a pirate like Kiefer.
posted by mostlybecky at 9:06 AM on November 9, 2009

People being pushed in office chairs; in a race.

Spiking the punch.
posted by jefftang at 9:15 AM on November 9, 2009

Covering a passed-out drunk person with Post-It notes.
posted by Oriole Adams at 9:50 AM on November 9, 2009

Jello molds with the bosse's desk accessories inside
posted by WeekendJen at 11:05 AM on November 9, 2009

Possible scenes:
- Office chair jousting with umbrellas or long fluorescent light bulbs.
- PERSONAL PHONE CALLS to far-away country codes.
- Some distance from the merriment, someone guiltily checking the hallway while raiding the supply closet.
- All the food containers in the kitchen fridge having been obviously ransacked.
posted by wenestvedt at 11:47 AM on November 9, 2009

Someone using the fire extinguisher to propel themselves backward in an office chair, like this.
posted by jocelmeow at 12:03 PM on November 9, 2009

I would go easy on the images that involve inappropriate sexual stuff unless you're really sure that's ok with everyone who would get the card. SO easy to misinterpret, over-interpret, etc.

Generic party images (tailor to your industry/colleagues):

Conga line through the cubes
Can-can line of drunken higher-ups (execs etc)
Someone in a gorilla costume, maybe throwing banana peels that other people slip on
Guy with necktie wrapped around his head like Karate Kid (would work with fluorescent tube saber fight)
Paper airplanes made of your equivalent of TPS reports
Streamers, confetti, other standard party decorations, made of industry/your office-specific materials
Racing roller-chairs
Brewing alcohol in the office in some industry-specific vat? Or secret stash of alcohol revealed in hidden compartment of industry-specific thing you have in your office? (Eg the big filing cabinet in the corner opens to reveal: well stocked bar)
posted by LobsterMitten at 1:00 PM on November 9, 2009

Somebody throwing up or peeing in the office potted plant.
A bra hanging off of the ceiling fan, file cabinet, or the water cooler.
That odd lady shoveling all the buffet food into her oversized handbag.
posted by TooFewShoes at 3:35 PM on November 9, 2009

Stealing a laptop by hiding it under their coat
Someone throwing up in the top desk drawer
Giving a shot of booze to the pimply-faced mail boy.
Flashing Santa Clause
Driving a lawnmower (ala Madmen)
Throwing files out the window
Someones coat caught in the shredder
posted by Acacia at 5:04 PM on November 9, 2009

How about a nerdy looking guy with eyes popping, and tongue hanging out, peeking over a cubicle at a voluptuous woman wearing a short red with white fur mini dress and his tie with X-mas trees on it, gets caught in the shredder that's on a table next to the wall.
posted by LindaLou21356 at 2:20 AM on November 10, 2009

A framed picture of the stuffy and properly dressed founder of the company, with a shocked look on his face.
A high heel shoe in the punchbowl.
A bird that ran into the window--splat!
Marijuana hanging from a ribbon like mistletoe.
A guy wearing a bra on the outside of his suit.
The night janitor cowering and quivering under a desk.
posted by Acacia at 3:52 AM on November 10, 2009