Say now shibboleth
October 24, 2009 10:53 AM Subscribe
Do I have a stammer? How do I fix it?
I've never had speech problems; I'm just a reserved, almost taciturn person. My mind runs a lot faster than my mouth. As nice a trait as this may be, I'm now in a line of work that's got a lot more smooth talkers than otherwise.
I've worked on being a faster talker, quicker off the mark, and I've improved, but I have a problem now. I've found that I will freeze up and be unable to say the word that I know damn well comes next. For example, I was recently trying to advise someone at work how to proceed, following my long off-the-cuff analysis of a certain situation, and I needed to end the sentence with a certain term ("TPS report"). I work with these documents every day -- I spend a lot of my job dealing with them -- and yet I could not say the word. I was waving my hands, snapping my fingers, saying "the t- . . . the t- . . ." And my coworker kindly supplied what I meant. Naturally I was embarrassed, even though I was in a friendly situation; how much worse would it be if it were adversarial?
I don't think this is the kind of thing that calls for speech therapy -- anyway, I'm 30. I wouldn't call it stage fright, either; I used to be a big amateur performer, so I've never been afraid of being heard. But if there are some explanations or, particularly, exercises I could perform, verbally or just mentally, I would appreciate it.
I've never had speech problems; I'm just a reserved, almost taciturn person. My mind runs a lot faster than my mouth. As nice a trait as this may be, I'm now in a line of work that's got a lot more smooth talkers than otherwise.
I've worked on being a faster talker, quicker off the mark, and I've improved, but I have a problem now. I've found that I will freeze up and be unable to say the word that I know damn well comes next. For example, I was recently trying to advise someone at work how to proceed, following my long off-the-cuff analysis of a certain situation, and I needed to end the sentence with a certain term ("TPS report"). I work with these documents every day -- I spend a lot of my job dealing with them -- and yet I could not say the word. I was waving my hands, snapping my fingers, saying "the t- . . . the t- . . ." And my coworker kindly supplied what I meant. Naturally I was embarrassed, even though I was in a friendly situation; how much worse would it be if it were adversarial?
I don't think this is the kind of thing that calls for speech therapy -- anyway, I'm 30. I wouldn't call it stage fright, either; I used to be a big amateur performer, so I've never been afraid of being heard. But if there are some explanations or, particularly, exercises I could perform, verbally or just mentally, I would appreciate it.
I used to be a very fluent speaker, despite my standard-issue geek social anxiety, because in business and "public" settings I could wear a certain persona. I find as I get older (I'm 45 now) little niggling word-choice things like this occur more. They also occur more when I'm stressed. But as I understand it it's a natural function of aging.
No, 30 isn't old, but your brain basically grows until age 25 ... and then your brain shrinks. Slowly, at first. More severely if you develop a dementia. But not so it affects most people throughout their working life.
Socially, you can cover for this -- make it seem like a quiz, perhaps? -- but it's probably better to just laugh it off. At your age it's even a joke to call it a "senior moment". Or you can just figure out ways to change to a new sentence/subject as you in this case had already made your point. Conversation is full of broken-off sentences anyway.
I do love how references to TPS Reports are instantly understood. How that movie, despite its flaws, hit home.
posted by dhartung at 1:37 PM on October 24, 2009
No, 30 isn't old, but your brain basically grows until age 25 ... and then your brain shrinks. Slowly, at first. More severely if you develop a dementia. But not so it affects most people throughout their working life.
Socially, you can cover for this -- make it seem like a quiz, perhaps? -- but it's probably better to just laugh it off. At your age it's even a joke to call it a "senior moment". Or you can just figure out ways to change to a new sentence/subject as you in this case had already made your point. Conversation is full of broken-off sentences anyway.
I do love how references to TPS Reports are instantly understood. How that movie, despite its flaws, hit home.
posted by dhartung at 1:37 PM on October 24, 2009
When you were unable to say the word, did you know the word in your head (like you could mentally say it to yourself but not manage to say it aloud), or could you not quite think of the word? A stammer would be more like the former. The latter is the tip of the tongue phenomenon.
Does it only happen with work terms or at work? Or does it happen in other areas of life too?
Do you notice it happening with people's names?
(I don't have any solution, it happens to me too. I gesture and say "whatsit" or a similar placeholder word.)
posted by LobsterMitten at 11:00 PM on October 24, 2009
Does it only happen with work terms or at work? Or does it happen in other areas of life too?
Do you notice it happening with people's names?
(I don't have any solution, it happens to me too. I gesture and say "whatsit" or a similar placeholder word.)
posted by LobsterMitten at 11:00 PM on October 24, 2009
Your problem sounds like a pretty normal reaction to your attempt to change your speaking rate. Your natural speech rate is a habitual thing, and an attempt to change that habit will require your brain and mouth to adjust. Most likely, it will get easier.
It sounds like there may be a psychological component involved here as well. The fact that you are conscientious enough about your speaking rate to make the effort to change it implies that you have some level of discomfort around your coworkers regarding your speech. It is certainly normal to use "fillers" (e.g. "uh", "um") or pauses while you are trying to form the next word. However, if the problem becomes worse, you may want to lay off & focus on your confidence in the workplace.
posted by eabomo at 9:27 AM on October 25, 2009
It sounds like there may be a psychological component involved here as well. The fact that you are conscientious enough about your speaking rate to make the effort to change it implies that you have some level of discomfort around your coworkers regarding your speech. It is certainly normal to use "fillers" (e.g. "uh", "um") or pauses while you are trying to form the next word. However, if the problem becomes worse, you may want to lay off & focus on your confidence in the workplace.
posted by eabomo at 9:27 AM on October 25, 2009
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If it happens to you every sentence, or you find you can't say anything without getting hung up, it may be worth working on, but your description doesn't sound very unusual at all.
It helps me, when I'm going to be leading a training session or something like that, to memorize and practice saying phrases which are likely to come up. Not even whole sentences, just phrases I can string together in blocks larger than individual words. "Tongue twister" training, as it were. "Average logarithmic energy decrement per collision" doesn't exactly roll off the tongue unless you've said it a few times recently. Practicing "exposure to ionizing radiation to the whole body." etc, keeps me from ending a sentence lamely, using slang or just trailing off with a hand wave.
posted by ctmf at 11:13 AM on October 24, 2009