How to save for travel as a gift?

October 6, 2009 7:08 AM

For his birthday, my boyfriend has suggested that we set up some sort joint savings account so that we can put money in it as our gifts to each other (birthdays, holidays, etc.) to later spend on travel - a passion of both of ours. I like the idea of somehow starting our little "travel fund" for our next trips and keeping it going through the years (and avoiding spending the money on "stuff" that we don't appreciate as much as the experiences we share together when we travel). How can I fulfill this great gifting idea that we can use for each other without feeling nervous about the non-married money-sharing aspect? Seeking either alternative ideas or advice on the shared bank account route?

I know his intentions are good, and we speak of marriage/our future all the time - this guy is a keeper, not a "random" boyfriend. Marriage hasn't happened yet, but it is in the plans & we travel at least a few times a year, so far.

posted by anonymous to travel & transportation (12 comments total)

I think it’s a cute idea. What are you worried about? You’re not putting your life savings in there so the worst that could happen is he runs off with some floozie with a couple thousand from your gift fund, which is not the end of the world.
posted by Think_Long at 7:14 AM on October 6

My boyfriend and I set up a joint ING savings account awhile back that takes money directly out of our paychecks every week ($10/week) strictly for shared expenses such as travel or emergency. I was a little iffy about that too, but if you break up you can always split the money evenly. You just have to have enough trust in each other to know that that will happen. It was easy to set up, and it's a nice, tangible thing that represents your trust in each other and your mutual investment in future good times together.
posted by amethysts at 7:15 AM on October 6

Me and mine kept a jar in the house and labelled it '"vacation fund" We'd put a certain amount in it and also all of our pocket change on a day to day basis. Since a savings account isn't really going to get you much interest nowadays, a jar that you can watch fill up might be just as good.
posted by jessamyn at 7:17 AM on October 6

Look into bank accounts that require signatures of both of the owners for withdrawals.
posted by fermezporte at 7:19 AM on October 6 [4 favorites]

Great idea. I don't understand what you're worried about, especially since it's an account for just one thing at a time anyway. What, he might run off and steal your Hawaii money?

(Then again, I had a joint bank account with my GF about a week after we met, so maybe I'm not a good judge of these things.)
posted by rokusan at 7:42 AM on October 6

Why don't you both just separately save the money in your own acccounts, and just keep each other up to date on how the funds are growing - and only merge when the time to spend it arrives? Transferring money from one account to another, even between banks, is pretty trivial now.
posted by backwards guitar at 8:13 AM on October 6

I see why you're concerned, but think about it this way: if it's money that you would otherwise spend on things that you give him, you're not losing out if he skips with the money -- he wouldn't give gifts back if you broke up. and you don't want crap sitting around from an ex anyway, so you're still not missing out.
posted by phritosan at 8:16 AM on October 6

What phritosan said is a great point.

I kind of like the idea. There's a certain point where the fun of something has to trump the anxiety of it. It's not like you're combining all of your funds. And it doesn't sound like he's the sort of guy who would, should a break-up occur, drain the account and split. Even in my worst and most bitter break-ups I would never have stolen what was effectively my SO's money.
posted by Lutoslawski at 8:35 AM on October 6

Ooh, I like phritosan's idea. That would definitely assuage my fears about something like this. Man, when I think back on how much money I spent on rad gifts for boyfriends that I'll never get to play with again, this plan sounds better and better...
posted by booknerd at 8:38 AM on October 6

If you're with him and especially if he's a "keeper", he's not the sort of person who would steal your travel fund.
posted by turkeyphant at 9:43 AM on October 6

How can I fulfill this great gifting idea that we can use for each other without feeling nervous about the non-married money-sharing aspect?

This is how you're going to be comfortable when you're married and sharing everything. Think of this as "practice", a way to build up to the marriage thing. You want to go from zero to sixty in one day?

Also, consider that this may be a gesture from your boyfriend about how serious he is and how committed he is to you.
posted by spaltavian at 11:15 AM on October 6

You can get a bank account that has both of your names on it and would require both signatures for a withdrawl. That would probably solve the issue assuming you believe that spliting the money could be done civilly between you two should the relationship end.
posted by WeekendJen at 1:24 PM on October 6