Lend me your dirty mind.

October 3, 2009 12:35 PM

Help me make 'Cripple Creek' more R-rated.

So this song is fun.

I can't help thinking, though, that it could be better. I need YOU to help me write rated-R verses for it.

Premise: Cripple Creek is kind of far away and a pain in the ass to get to. There is one good reason to go there, though: the girls in Cripple Creek are, let's say, easy. When you go to Cripple Creek, you'll get some action. Tell me what YOU'RE going to do in Cripple Creek, or maybe about the last time you went, or about the girl you have there.

Or, maybe you're a girl from Cripple Creek, tell me about yourself.

Bonus points for subtle innuendo, but that's not required. Yes, it's sexist. You can reverse the genders if you like.

posted by ctmf to media & arts (4 comments total)

It's already racy:

Cripple Creek girls, about half grown
jump on man like a dog on a bone

How can you improve on that?
posted by RussHy at 1:29 PM on October 3

Hmm. Well, we can change

Hills are steep and the roads are muddy
And I'm so drunk that I can't stand steady

to something like

Whores are cheap and the men are slutty
I been fucked so hard that I can't stand steady

Also, I think you need to ditch the sexism and just figure that everybody in Cripple Creek, as well as everybody who visits there, is bisexual, polyamorous and kinky. The best line in Nick Cave's version of 'Stagger Lee' is 'Well, I'm a bad motherfucker, don't you know, but I'd crawl over fifty good pussies just to get to one fat boy's asshole.'

And 'creek' rhymes with 'freak.' Maybe you could do something with that.

(Buffy Sainte-Marie changed some lyrics for Sesame Street, but you probably already knew that.)
posted by box at 1:38 PM on October 3 [2 favorites]

(Buffy Sainte-Marie changed some lyrics for Sesame Street, but you probably already knew that.)

I suspected as much, but a 'net search only gets me more G and PG rated lyrics. Which, I suppose at one time were considered kind of edgy, maybe.
posted by ctmf at 1:43 PM on October 3

And 'creek' rhymes with 'freak.'

And creek is commonly pronounced crik where I come from.
posted by MrMoonPie at 1:58 PM on October 3