How to make sure a summer fling is understood as such
July 12, 2009 9:36 PM Subscribe
I started seeing this girl as a fun "summer fling" type relationship, but I think she's taking it more seriously then that. How can I ensure she isn't heartbroken at the end of the summer without killing the fun?
posted by Bahro to Human Relations (24 answers total)
At the beginning of the summer, I was at a party and I met a girl. We got to talking, and ended up kind of hooking up. (Though I hesitate to use that phrase, because really it was more innocent than that.)
Anyway, the next day, we had a sort of "where we stand" conversation, and I told her that I did want to pursue a relationship, however, I did not think it would last past the summer. Still, I said, we could have a fun summer, and she seemed to be okay with this. The main reason it won't work past the summer is that I am moving (far) away for college, while she is younger and still in high school.
We've continued seeing each other, and we're both having fun. However, I'm pretty sure (I'm also pretty sure that this isn't just my ego speaking) that she's becoming increasingly attached to me, and increasingly expecting me to stay with her past the summer.
What should I do? I don't want to basically kill the fun thing we have now by saying "oh yeah, by the way, the fling is over at the end of the summer," but I don't want to leave her heartbroken or (since she is friends with a few of my friends) make things really awkward when I come back to town. Do I have any sort of ethical obligation? Should I just not worry about it?
(oh yeah, if it isn't obvious, I'm sort of new to this whole thing)