Help finding a cool Christmas gift for my wife

December 7, 2004 2:26 PM

GiftFilter: With Christmas coming up, I'd like to do something cool and special for my wife but am having trouble figuring out what that cool and special thing is. Anyone have some cool ideas? [MI]

Her tastes run towards the practical but she's been hinting about jewelry (something I know nothing about and really don't see the point of). I want her to know that she's incredibly special to me as my wife, my best friend and mother to our son.

She likes making things but doesn't have alot of free time these days. Another thing to consider is that she's been exhausted alot lately because of the little boy so something to help her out there would be nice too.

Money is a factor but not the most important factor.

posted by fenriq to shopping (29 comments total)

If your practical wife has been hinting about jewelry it would be cool for you to take it seriously. Being practical, she will realize you need guidance. Ask her what sort of jewelry she likes. Ask her friends, too. Really.
posted by idest at 2:34 PM on December 7, 2004

if she's hinting for jewelry, go with jewelry. if she prefers silver to gold, take a look at tiffany. their sterling offerings are really quite affordable and there really is something to that robin's egg blue box.
posted by crush-onastick at 2:55 PM on December 7, 2004

take her to a jewelry store and let her pick something out. While it would be ideal that you already knew her style well enough to buy it yourself, it's obvious that you don't. So don't risk it. Nothing worse than buying something expensive that misses the mark. She's practical. She'll appreciate your reasoning.
posted by crunchland at 2:57 PM on December 7, 2004

If she likes making practical things, maybe she'd like to learn to knit. You can get beginner's kits at craft stores or yarn/knitting stores. Better yet, give her a gift of a knitting class. That will give her one night off a week and she can meet new people.
posted by achmorrison at 3:02 PM on December 7, 2004

I second the idea to take her jewelry hint seriously, and -- being practical -- she might not mind you asking. If you think she'd like to be surprised, though, you can go a couple of routes -- pearls are a classic (and I daresay classy) choice; a lovely set of pearl earrings would be timeless (likewise a set of diamond studs). You needn't break the bank to get a nice set that will really be special.

She also might like another precious or semi-precious stone, too -- emeralds and sapphires are lovely, too. If you'd like to go a little more "trendy" or unusual, the fancy-schmancy brooch (with lots of colors/stones) is very big this season.

You might want to check out Tiffany for more ideas -- don't be put off by the prices for some of the more, um, lavish items; there's plenty of lovely jewelry in there for under $500 or whatever your cutoff price might be. (And I hasten to add you don't have to buy from Tiffany either -- it may just give you a sense of what you might want to look for when you go shopping somewhere else.)
posted by scody at 3:06 PM on December 7, 2004

Purchase either the stone of her or your son's birth, wrap, and give. Include with it an appointment for her to meet with a designer to create a custom piece (necklace, ring, etc.).

Or one of those robot vacuum discs. . .
posted by Feisty at 3:21 PM on December 7, 2004

Oo, Feisty's got a pretty cool idea there. Might be a bit costly, but if she's creative, she might like to try her hand at a little custom jewelry design.
You can get chunks of semi-precious stone on Ebay, although I can't vouch for the quality.
posted by stray at 3:44 PM on December 7, 2004

Taking her to a jeweler is not as unromantic as it sounds. When my husband proposed, he had already scouted out some area jewelry stores and found one whose staff and selection he liked best. He also had looked through their stock of estate pieces to see if there was anything to my taste. Then he took me there, and we picked out a stone and ring together. Since I have to wear the ring every day, I enjoyed having a say in the selection. Even though this is a different situation, I like the idea of selecting a stone and then getting her input on the ring design. It makes the whole process part of the gift, if you think she'd go for that sort of thing.

Of course, I can't imagine anyone's been served divorce papers in return for a Tiffany's gift, so that might be the easier route.
posted by bibliowench at 3:52 PM on December 7, 2004

if you go with jewelry, please don't buy from tiffany's unless you know she'll like the style. i just looked through their catalogue, and i'm fairly sure my partner would be angry if i spent that much money on that kind of jewelry. i'm not saying tiffany isn't wonderful, if you like it, but i don't think it (or anything else) is a "safe neutral" for jewelry.

good luck!

(how about arranging for someone to look after the child and taking a relaxing day off together somewhere?)
posted by andrew cooke at 4:00 PM on December 7, 2004

i'm not saying tiffany isn't wonderful, if you like it, but i don't think it (or anything else) is a "safe neutral" for jewelry.


I don't know about that. I'm not usually inclined to making gender generalizations, but I tend to lean toward some possible hardwiring in the double-X chromosome that makes women go kind of loopy at the sight of the Little Blue Box.

Tiffany is silly, silly expensive. But I can tell you that when my husband whipped out a Tiffany box during a birthday dinner one year, my heart very nearly exploded in my chest. And it could pretty much have contained silverplated mouse turds for all I cared.

AND I kept the box, too.
posted by padraigin at 4:07 PM on December 7, 2004

Take her to the store, it's the only way. You can't win otherwise, unless you're so sensitive to her tastes that you're essentially no longer male. I have gotten my a** handed to me when it comes to picking out gifts, so now I let her drop great big hints.

tangent: I'm really pissed that the element of surprise is almost completely gone from gift giving. It underscores what an ugly little economic transaction it has become /rant.
posted by mecran01 at 4:08 PM on December 7, 2004

jewelry is great, especially if she's been hinting.

for a completely different idea.. how about a prepaid amount of housekeeping/maid sessions? just a chance to give a busy and practical mom a break every couple of weeks.
posted by mileena at 4:19 PM on December 7, 2004

Does your wife have a friend who might know her taste in jewelry? It would be nice if someone could do a little detective work for you so that you can make the gift a surprise. Women's tastes differ enormously when it comes to this stuff. I favor antique/ deco styles, but a lot of my friends like cleaner, more modern lines.
posted by sophie at 4:24 PM on December 7, 2004

In addition to jewelry, can I suggest a gift certificate to a good day spa? Never underestimate the value of old fashioned pampering, especially if she's exhausted.
posted by arha at 4:32 PM on December 7, 2004

ok, maybe i'm wrong. i'm not american, know nothing about your culture, and wouldn't know the significance of a pale blue box if it bit me on the arse. so i guess your wife is a lot more like the other people here than she is like pauli.
posted by andrew cooke at 4:36 PM on December 7, 2004

don't buy from tiffany's unless you know she'll like the style. i just looked through their catalogue, and i'm fairly sure my partner would be angry if i spent that much money on that kind of jewelry.

Oh I agree, the 5-digit items (hell, plenty of the 4-digit items) are totally insane -- when my ex and I got engaged, we showed the Tiffany "Etoile" style to a jewelry designer we knew to do a knockoff for my rings, and we saved literally thousands of bucks. But there are also some perfectly nice pearl studs in there (for example) for a couple of hundred dollars. (And, as others have pointed out, you get the Splendid Blue Box as well.) I just thought it might be a good way to generate some ideas for someone who, by his own admission, didn't really know where to start. I'd never in a million years say that something had to be from Tiffany's. (That would be my sister.)

Also, fenriq, I really like the idea suggested upthread of using your son's birthstone as well, if it's one you think she'd like.
posted by scody at 4:43 PM on December 7, 2004

I went to a friend who welds sculptures and gates and so forth. He made a steel and copper standing candelabra about six feet high out of a bundle of rods. The rods twist at the base like roots and fan out on top like branches. Copper flowers hold the candles at the tips of the branches.
He suggested the number of candles have some significance, and he was right: when I told her it had nine candles because we'd been dating nine months, she almost flipped.
posted by atchafalaya at 5:06 PM on December 7, 2004

Her tastes run towards the practical...

Given your question I can only suggest an airplane ride. The smaller the plane the better. That'll know her socks off, especially as the pilot flys over your house.

/has a generous pilot friend
posted by Cryptical Envelopment at 5:12 PM on December 7, 2004

www.cruzjewelry.com sea urchin bracelet and earrings - her friends will drool.
posted by specialk420 at 5:45 PM on December 7, 2004

www.cruzjewelry.com
posted by specialk420 at 5:46 PM on December 7, 2004

lesson: get a little blue box, then get the jewelry somewhere else.

(Looking through that catalog makes me wish I had bought some of the really elegant, well-designed & creative jewelry I saw in Naxos and Nauplio, just so I would have it on hand, even though it would basically have been a waste of money.)
posted by kenko at 5:50 PM on December 7, 2004

really, it's not that difficult to buy jewelry that your wife/girlfriend/mom/sister will like and wear if the woman currently owns and wears any jewelry at all. take a peek in her jewelry box. is it all silver? then for god's sake don't buy gold. is it all very delicate? then, really, don't buy something heavy and square. does she have a lot of really sparkly jewelry? then pearls are probably not her first choice.

pay the tiniest bit of attention to what she wears and you'll be able to pick out something she'd like. although bibliowench is right that sometimes picking out your own jewelry isn't unromantic, i think that for christmas it is. christmas presents, at least among the people i know, are more about the surprise than most other gifts.

oh, and under no circumstances put something else in a tiffany box. it's tacky and all the women i know would know. if she doesn't know, chances are she won't care that it's not in a tiffany box.
posted by crush-onastick at 6:15 PM on December 7, 2004

Day Spa. My wife has always been very happy with the Jurlique day spas.
posted by ahughey at 7:53 PM on December 7, 2004

get her a Kit to Make some jewelry.
posted by th3ph17 at 9:06 PM on December 7, 2004

here is some less formal jewelry.
posted by andrew cooke at 5:20 AM on December 8, 2004

I was in the same boat, jewelry-wise. I asked my wife's friends and mother about her tastes, and also ran my final choice by them before buying. I figured out what cut of diamond she liked best. I ended up buying on-line with Szul and was happy with the purchase. More importantly, my wife was happy with the purchase.

Some people will tell you not to buy on-line, but if your budget is limited (mine was), I think you can get a better price and more for your money on the Internets, if you shop carefully. Also, I found the snobbery in brick and mortar stores to be quite off-putting, especially after I mentioned my price range.
posted by Otis at 10:49 AM on December 8, 2004

I second the day-spa idea. Not necessarily in place of the jewelry idea. (If you get her something sweet without huge diamonds in, jewelry can be quite inexpensive.) But if she's worn out, a massage and pedicure will help her relax.
posted by turtlegirl at 11:05 AM on December 8, 2004

Thanks for all the great suggestions and ideas, I think I've got a plan in mind now and it'll incorporate several of the ideas here. I like the Day Spa idea alot and know that she could use the break.

But then, I've been lobbying hard for a hot tub for the house for a while now.
posted by fenriq at 12:12 PM on December 8, 2004

I have to caution against the practical 'let her help pick it out' idea for jewelry.

In my experience, jewelry tends to be more appreciated when the recipient is able to pretend that you didn't spend an indulgent amount of money on it.
posted by mosch at 4:20 PM on December 8, 2004