Did my friend feel any pain when he died?
June 26, 2009 2:38 PM Subscribe
I just found out yesterday that someone that I cared very deeply for died a few years ago from an overdose of heroin. I have a few questions regarding the nature of his death and etiquette surrounding contacting his family.
posted by zerokey to Society & Culture (15 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
I apologize for the broad scope of the question; I hope it's not breaking the rules.
I just found out that my best friend in high school died from a heroin overdose a few years ago and I've been very shaken up and upset since I found out, so, selfishly, part of this question is something that I'm hoping will bring me some modicum of comfort.
An important thing here is that we had a falling out at one point and hadn't spoken in 16 years, but I always carried him in my head and my heart and hoped for the day, after enough time passed that we could meet again smile about the old days.
1. I understand that there can only be speculation concerning the specific events of his death. I find it comforting to think that he just blissfully slipped away, but I can't lie to myself if that's not the case and I need to know if it's possible that he had a painful death. I have no experience with heroin, but taking into consideration the fact that heroin is a powerful opiate, what are the chances that he experienced any physical pain post-injection?
2. Would it be appropriate to contact his family with my condolences and to find out where he is buried?
3. It's been 16 years and he died 5 years ago, but it's affecting me as if we had never been apart and he just died yesterday. Is that "normal"? Nothing I do or feel ever fits in to "normal", but these feelings feel so abnormal that I have to question them.
Thanks for any help you can give.