June 3, 2009 1:33 PM Subscribe
I've a boyfriend visiting me for a couple of months soon, from outside the US. Funds on his end are quite low, as he's still a student, so I'll be supporting both of us while he's here. (I'm happy to do it, I've a steady full-time job and I've really missed him since he was last here, a few months ago.) What I'd like to know is, would it be appropriate for me to also give him some spending cash for whatever small things he'd like to get for himself, during his stay? A prepaid card of sorts? And, how should I approach this without making him feel like he's completely dependent on me, even if that might be the reality? I'd like to be delicate.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (21 answers total)
Information that might be relevant or helpful:
* We've been dating for several years, although this is the longest visit so far.
* Neither one of us has any weird spending habits, and we're on the same page when we've discussed various aspects of finances previously.
* I bought the tickets for this flight and his previous one - and he's admitted to feeling a little like he already "owes" me, though I don't share the same sentiment. That's why I'd like to be delicate about the extra spending money issue.
* I'm completely fine with supporting him while he's here. He's a total sweetheart when it comes to helping me around my place. He loves cooking, so I always have help with dinner, he's great about keeping things clean, and we never argue about one person not pulling their weight in the relationship.
I'm probably giving more details than necessary, but I've found that mefi is a curious place and it's good to cover all bases with anonymous questions :)
What it basically boils down to is: how much, and how?