She wants a different dress.

May 11, 2009 9:45 AM

My fiance bought a $1,000 wedding dress from a local (Chicago) shop, paying a $500 deposit. She wants a different dress now, from a different store, that is cheap enough to still be less than $1000 total (considering the previous deposit), so is thinking about not picking up the dress and eating the $500. But...

... is this kosher? Is this what the deposit is protecting the store from? She doesn't mind that she basically wasted $500, but she doesn't want the store coming back to her requesting the other $500.

The dress was ordered but has not been fitted.

Understandably, this varies from store to store and we should just call them and ask, but that sort of gives away our motive and could negatively effect the outcome. Plus, I'd rather have more info going into that conversation.

Do we have any sort of legal or ethical obligation to paying the full price for the dress if we're willing to give up the deposit?

We'd rather not futz with having to sell it. We have enough to worry about as is.

posted by wordsmith to work & money (18 comments total)

If the dress hasn't been fitted--in other words it could be sold easily to another woman--then it should be totally kosher. The store probably included some kind of payment/return policy with the receipt she received after paying the deposit. If not, I'd call (or have someone else call) and ask a hypothetical--"I think I'd like to order a dress through your store, but I have a question about how the ordering process works... I pay a deposit, you order the dress, and then what happens if I decide I want another dress or the wedding plan change or whatever?" They'll explain their exact policy, but unless the dress is custom-made or custom-tailored, I can't imagine you'll lose more than the deposit, if that.
posted by Meg_Murry at 9:53 AM on May 11

From the store's point of view, isn't this pretty much what the deposit is for? The have your fiancee's money and the dress, which they can now sell to someone else.
posted by trip and a half at 10:24 AM on May 11

If I was the shop owner, I'd want you to tell me ASAP - you may be able to get your whole deposit back if it hasn't been ordered yet, or have them find the exact (cheap) dress you want instead.

Be up front with the people who can give you your money back - you have nothing to lose.
posted by bensherman at 10:28 AM on May 11

Call them now. Say that circumstances have changed and she can't buy the dress. Ask if it is too late to get a refund on the deposit. If they say "no" then ask if she can get a partial refund. Don't just lie down and eat $500 for no reason.
posted by amanda at 10:31 AM on May 11 [4 favorites has favorites]

tell them the wedding is off & there's no need for the dress now.
posted by msconduct at 10:38 AM on May 11

There's nothing to lose by contacting them, and it's likely that she will get some part of the $500 back. The dress hasn't been fitted - so the store can either re-sell the dress or return it themselves.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 10:42 AM on May 11

Update: I found the receipt. Here's what it says,

-One half deposit is required on all ordered items [what we paid]
-No cancellations, refunds, exchanges, or transferring deposits to other items...

...

-Dresses left in the store 10 days after the wedding or cancelled date wil be sold and all deposits forgeited
-Any item ordered by you and charged to your bill cannot be cancelled or returned.

So, wtf?
posted by wordsmith at 10:54 AM on May 11

Err, forfeited, not forgeited.

So how can they really say that there can be no cancellations? They can't, in my book -- shit happens. But, based on that verbage, can they make us pay the remainder of the balance?
posted by wordsmith at 10:58 AM on May 11

But, based on that verbage, can they make us pay the remainder of the balance?

Possibly, because many bills of sale are written so as to be a legally enforceable contract.

It might not be worth it to them to take your fiancee to small claims court for $500, especially if they could resell the dress for that or more. But my guess is that they could do that, if they are using a bill-of-sale form drawn up by an attorney, as most bridal shops do.

It's also a pretty jerky thing to do for your fiancee not to tell them that she doesn't want the dress anymore. A more honest thing to do, especially if she's willing to eat some or all of the deposit, is for her to call and tell them she can't take the dress and that she hopes they can work something out. If the "something" is for her to eat the $500 she's already laid out, she'll have lost nothing through honesty, and if she has the ovaries to be upfront with them, they'll be less likely to want to take her to court.
posted by Sidhedevil at 11:06 AM on May 11

So how can they really say that there can be no cancellations? They can't, in my book -- shit happens.

Your fiance signed a contract that said she agreed to the terms of their policy; you are allowed to give up your own rights in a contract, wise or not. That said, it's not clear from the part you quoted if their "no cancellations" means that they expect the other half, or if they just mean they won't refund the deposit under any circumstances.

Ask them now.
posted by nomisxid at 11:10 AM on May 11

But, based on that verbage, can they make us pay the remainder of the balance?

They can't make you do anything without suing you/taking you to small claims, and they're probably not going to in this case....as long as you're up front about it. Just call them and tell them you won't be buying the dress. They will most likely say that you'll have to forefit all/part of your deposit. Yeah, it sucks on their end to lose a sale, but it's better if they still have the option to sell the dress and have your deposit - I mean, they're making $500 off of selling nothing, basically.

Don't let it sit in their inventory eating up space if they can sell it to someone else, that's just flat out not fair (and I say this as someone who thinks spending more than $50 on a piece of clothing is crazy).
posted by AlisonM at 11:15 AM on May 11

tell them the wedding is off & there's no need for the dress now.

Don't tempt fate this way. Also, embarrassing and fraudulent if the person selling you the dress hears otherwise in say, a wedding announcement in the paper, etc.
posted by slateyness at 11:18 AM on May 11

Treat others as you would like to be treated.
To leave the store hanging and walk away would be incredibly rude. People who behave this way are the reason why they have to have a $500 deposit in the first place. She must call them and tell them honestly that she won't be requiring the dress.

Lying about the wedding being canceled like someone suggested is totally unnecessary and will come back to bite you some way, count on it.
If your fiancee or yourself truly feel that you don't have the social skills or maturity to handle the conversation, perhaps you have a parent or adult mentor you can ask to call on your behalf.

But I suggest that this is a great opportunity for your fiancee to learn to deal with her responsibilities like an adult.
posted by Catch at 2:06 PM on May 11

Call and cancel the order immediately. If they haven't fitted the dress yet, there's no reason you should be on the hook for the other $500.

If they still want you to pay the other half of the deposit, you could just say no. Assuming the dress can still be sold, they probably won't make trouble or report you to collections.

Now if it HAS been fitted already, there's much more incentive for them to play hardball.
posted by dualityofmind at 2:44 PM on May 11

We're not interested in lying. Of course we'll be letting the store know.

But I suggest that this is a great opportunity for your fiancee to learn to deal with her responsibilities like an adult.

I suggest you base your answer not on the contents of the previous answers, but on the question itself.
posted by wordsmith at 2:47 PM on May 11 [7 favorites has favorites]

Is there any chance that the original shop can order the new dress for you? Even if it's not on the racks in their shop, maybe it can be special ordered and the down payment can be applied to the new dress since the first one has not yet been altered. If your fiance has the manufacturer's name and item number from the dress she wants, it may be worth trying to work with the shop that already has some of your money.
posted by contrariwise at 4:04 PM on May 11

Why don't you call them and ask without telling them who you are? Just tell them you have ordered a dress and paid a deposit, and ask if their policies would allow you to forfeit the deposit and cancel the order. Use a work phone or block your number from call display if you're really paranoid. Then, if you get an answer you like, you can move on to actually canceling that order, and if you don't, you're armed with the actual information you needed, instead of speculation from the internet.

But as long as we're speculating:

I'd assume based on the terms you quote that forfeiting the deposit will be enough. They'll sell your dress later if you don't pay for it and pick it up, but it doesn't say they'll come after you for more money. It's not likely they'll punish you more for being upfront and saying you don't want it than they would for you just never coming to get it and leaving it there for months on end.
posted by jacquilynne at 4:54 PM on May 11

this is why this shop has this policy, in case it wasn't obvious.
posted by micawber at 6:24 PM on May 11