positive male behavior
March 30, 2009 3:55 PM Subscribe
I am looking for literature or cinema depicting positive male behavior.
That is, men acting in mature, forward, ways.
Atticus Finch in To Kill A Mockingbird. Of course there's plenty of bad examples too.
posted by annaramma at 3:59 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by annaramma at 3:59 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
Razumihin in Crime and Punishment?
posted by prefpara at 4:10 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by prefpara at 4:10 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
I recently saw Happy-Go-Lucky and thought the character Tim was an excellent male role model.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 4:12 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 4:12 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
Need a little perspective here. Are you looking John Wayne or Alan Alda?
I mean, depending on how utterly irreproachable you want, you can get a whole mess of gamut with Russell Crowe alone.
posted by IndigoJones at 4:12 PM on March 30, 2009
I mean, depending on how utterly irreproachable you want, you can get a whole mess of gamut with Russell Crowe alone.
posted by IndigoJones at 4:12 PM on March 30, 2009
Patrick O'Brian's Aubrey/Maturin novels, while not depicting perfect gentlemen by any means, do depict men acting heroically, thoughtfully, and selflessly. Of course, these are military men of the 18th century, so their idea of "mature, forward ways" may be very different from what you are seeking.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 4:16 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by BitterOldPunk at 4:16 PM on March 30, 2009
Damn. And of course IndigoJones links to Master and Commander. This thread is gettin' jinxy.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 4:17 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by BitterOldPunk at 4:17 PM on March 30, 2009
I'm just gonna go ahead and say Robert Duvall in Tender Mercies, because I like that movie.
posted by turgid dahlia at 4:26 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by turgid dahlia at 4:26 PM on March 30, 2009
You can't go wrong with Lloyd Dobler in the movie Say Anything. (imdb, wikipedia)
posted by amyms at 4:30 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by amyms at 4:30 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
What IndigoJones said. I am also not sure what "mature and forward ways" means. Does it mean not being a jerk? If so, most Jane Austen heros would qualify even. Does Jamie in Outlander count? For his era, certainly. What about Biehn's characters in Terminator and Aliens? They were pretty far from macho (while still capable of ass kicking) but I'm not sure if that's the same as mature and forward.
posted by small_ruminant at 4:33 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by small_ruminant at 4:33 PM on March 30, 2009
David Strathairn's character in John Sayles's Limbo.
posted by hot soup girl at 4:45 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by hot soup girl at 4:45 PM on March 30, 2009
La Grande illusion to me portrays amazing, complex, mature behavior in its characters--a group of French officers who are prisoners of war.
Daniel Burman, a young Argentinean director, has made some extraordinary movies about fathers and sons.
posted by Sidhedevil at 4:57 PM on March 30, 2009
Daniel Burman, a young Argentinean director, has made some extraordinary movies about fathers and sons.
posted by Sidhedevil at 4:57 PM on March 30, 2009
This thread is gettin' jinxy.
(Sorry, man. But hey, you went the high brow bookish route, so, full marks.)
posted by IndigoJones at 5:12 PM on March 30, 2009
(Sorry, man. But hey, you went the high brow bookish route, so, full marks.)
posted by IndigoJones at 5:12 PM on March 30, 2009
Friday Night Lights, the tv show. Coach Taylor. Tim Riggins, often. Jason Street, as well. Actually, most of the central male characters in that show.
Also, The Insider, the movie. Both Crowe and Pacino's characters.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 5:30 PM on March 30, 2009
Also, The Insider, the movie. Both Crowe and Pacino's characters.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 5:30 PM on March 30, 2009
Robert Duvall, again, in "Second-Hand Lions".
posted by trinity8-director at 5:34 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by trinity8-director at 5:34 PM on March 30, 2009
Friday Night Lights the show. Coach Taylor, Matt Saracen and Landry Clarke (if you ignore the second season for these two- ugh, executive meddling), and Jason Street. Tim Riggins in the later end of the third season is a good example of growing up into it eventually.
posted by jenfullmoon at 6:08 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by jenfullmoon at 6:08 PM on March 30, 2009
The best dad I've ever seen is the father in My Neighbor Totoro. He treats his children with respect and comforts them when they're fearful.
posted by SPrintF at 6:14 PM on March 30, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by SPrintF at 6:14 PM on March 30, 2009 [2 favorites]
Response by poster: no Alan Alda. But yes, "not being a jerk". Can talk to a kid w/out trying to be cool; appreciates women w/out being stupid or inversely, "sensitive"; doesn't need to win every fight or have the last word. Hard to avoid stereotypes here, sorry.
posted by ebesan at 6:18 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by ebesan at 6:18 PM on March 30, 2009
What about some Jane Austen? Edward Ferrars and Colonel Brandon in Sense and Sensibility? I'm sure there are other examples, you Jane Austen-ites out there...
posted by dubitable at 6:42 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by dubitable at 6:42 PM on March 30, 2009
David Strathairn's character in George Clooney's Good Night, and Good Luck.
posted by dubitable at 6:45 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by dubitable at 6:45 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
David Strathairn's character in George Clooney's Good Night, and Good Luck.
You mean, real-life journalist Edward R Murrow? He was definitely admirable, but not so much a character as a real guy.
posted by crossoverman at 6:54 PM on March 30, 2009
You mean, real-life journalist Edward R Murrow? He was definitely admirable, but not so much a character as a real guy.
posted by crossoverman at 6:54 PM on March 30, 2009
@crossoverman, sorry I was playing off of this.
And as a counterpoint, I would argue that one can separate the character in the movie from the real Mr. Murrow, certainly. The Edward R. Murrow in the film was an idealized version, don't you think?
posted by dubitable at 7:00 PM on March 30, 2009
And as a counterpoint, I would argue that one can separate the character in the movie from the real Mr. Murrow, certainly. The Edward R. Murrow in the film was an idealized version, don't you think?
posted by dubitable at 7:00 PM on March 30, 2009
I've always liked the dad in Juno (though people around here seem to hate that movie). I found him to be supportive and real.
Also, you might want to be even more descriptive, because people are really struggling to figure out what you want.
posted by !Jim at 7:28 PM on March 30, 2009
Also, you might want to be even more descriptive, because people are really struggling to figure out what you want.
posted by !Jim at 7:28 PM on March 30, 2009
I think Michael Cera's character in Superbad would fit, maybe.
posted by ifjuly at 7:50 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by ifjuly at 7:50 PM on March 30, 2009 [1 favorite]
I liked Rock Hudson in All That Heaven Allows. Confident and assertive, yet soft-spoken and not a jerk.
posted by ambulatorybird at 9:05 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by ambulatorybird at 9:05 PM on March 30, 2009
Both Prince Andrei and Nikolai Rostov from War and Peace would fit the bill, though in very different ways.
posted by Commander Rachek at 9:09 PM on March 30, 2009
posted by Commander Rachek at 9:09 PM on March 30, 2009
Older guy: Alvin Straight in The Straight Story.
Anything about Fred Rogers. Not literature, exactly, but this profile (pilfered from Esquire) is profound and affecting.
Konstantin Levin from Anna Karenina is an amazingly decent, if imperfect, person.
I think the viewer comes to care for the father in Bicycle Thieves a great deal -- not a hero per se, but a decent man.
posted by argybarg at 10:10 PM on March 30, 2009
Anything about Fred Rogers. Not literature, exactly, but this profile (pilfered from Esquire) is profound and affecting.
Konstantin Levin from Anna Karenina is an amazingly decent, if imperfect, person.
I think the viewer comes to care for the father in Bicycle Thieves a great deal -- not a hero per se, but a decent man.
posted by argybarg at 10:10 PM on March 30, 2009
I'm interpreting "forward" to mean "self-aware, kind to to others, and willing to own & work on his weaknesses." If that's what you mean, then:
Currently in cinema, I Love You Man is pretty great for this. The two lead characters in it (played by Paul Rudd & Jason Segal) aren't particularly flawed; they're both really likeable and they both work on their issues.
Jim on NBC's The Office is pretty great most of the time.
There's a great episode in Season 1 of 30-Rock called The Head and The Hair; the male guest star/love interest, The Hair, is awesome, a perfect gentleman.
It's worth keeping in mind that a lot of literary & cinematic characters will start off flawed and fix the flaw by the end of the story, as that's the character arc for the protagonist of many stories. The other option is a "travelling angel" character, where the protagionist is always noble & good, and the plot revolves around him changing the lives of people he encounters- maybe that's more of what you're seeking, and if so, TV Tropes is a website with lots of descriptions of familiar media tropes and examples of films that use them. Here's one called Nice To The Waiter; the good guy in a movie is always identifiable because he treats the social underclasses with respect.
posted by pseudostrabismus at 11:58 PM on March 30, 2009
Currently in cinema, I Love You Man is pretty great for this. The two lead characters in it (played by Paul Rudd & Jason Segal) aren't particularly flawed; they're both really likeable and they both work on their issues.
Jim on NBC's The Office is pretty great most of the time.
There's a great episode in Season 1 of 30-Rock called The Head and The Hair; the male guest star/love interest, The Hair, is awesome, a perfect gentleman.
It's worth keeping in mind that a lot of literary & cinematic characters will start off flawed and fix the flaw by the end of the story, as that's the character arc for the protagonist of many stories. The other option is a "travelling angel" character, where the protagionist is always noble & good, and the plot revolves around him changing the lives of people he encounters- maybe that's more of what you're seeking, and if so, TV Tropes is a website with lots of descriptions of familiar media tropes and examples of films that use them. Here's one called Nice To The Waiter; the good guy in a movie is always identifiable because he treats the social underclasses with respect.
posted by pseudostrabismus at 11:58 PM on March 30, 2009
Levin in Anna Karenina is a portrait of a man who is struggling to figure out what it means to be a man honorably - connected to his land, fair to his employees, loving to his wife, patriotic and yet critical of his country - and succeeds ultimately by accepting that his whole life will consist of that struggle and that he will find nobility in meeting it head on. He is well contrasted with Vronsky, who appears at first to be a strong and dashing masculine ideal, but is revealed as weak and empty, and with Karenin, whose strength appears to be rooted in the steadfastness of his moral principles, but is actually only using these immovable and unthinking principles to hide from painful and confusing emotions and circumstances.
If this isn't too bathetic, I think the captain in Wall-E is a good pop culture example of someone who, along with his entire community, had lost his humanity through losing the opportunity to have responsibility to anyone or anything; when he realizes that he and the others can and should return to the Earth to take care of it, and embraces the idea that they are needed and have obligations, he enables the entire race to regain its humanity through shared and mutually supporting responsibilities (the root of community) and through connection to and stewarship of the earth.
posted by Betsy Vane at 12:09 AM on March 31, 2009 [2 favorites]
If this isn't too bathetic, I think the captain in Wall-E is a good pop culture example of someone who, along with his entire community, had lost his humanity through losing the opportunity to have responsibility to anyone or anything; when he realizes that he and the others can and should return to the Earth to take care of it, and embraces the idea that they are needed and have obligations, he enables the entire race to regain its humanity through shared and mutually supporting responsibilities (the root of community) and through connection to and stewarship of the earth.
posted by Betsy Vane at 12:09 AM on March 31, 2009 [2 favorites]
Tim Robbins' Andy Dufresne in The Shawshank Redemption.
Graham Chapman in Life of Brian.
posted by anarcation at 1:20 AM on March 31, 2009
Graham Chapman in Life of Brian.
posted by anarcation at 1:20 AM on March 31, 2009
People have mentioned my two top choices already: Twelve Angry Men and To Kill a Mockingbird.
posted by alon at 1:50 AM on March 31, 2009
posted by alon at 1:50 AM on March 31, 2009
Big Fish is probably more about the son evolving into a decent character; in Bend It Like Beckham Jules' father is supportive of his daughter's atypical sporting interest, while Jess' comes around; both of them are supporting their daughters again significant pressure from their mothers.
Auggie in Smoke & Blue in the Face is a stand up guy. Giles and, toward the later seasons, Xander in Buffy might fit your criteria.
Action's a little more problematic; Jean Reno's character in Ronin, or Chris in The Magnificent Seven have a lot of masculine virtues, but you don't really see them interact with women (for example), so they could be a bit one-dimensional for what you're after.
posted by rodgerd at 2:16 AM on March 31, 2009
Auggie in Smoke & Blue in the Face is a stand up guy. Giles and, toward the later seasons, Xander in Buffy might fit your criteria.
Action's a little more problematic; Jean Reno's character in Ronin, or Chris in The Magnificent Seven have a lot of masculine virtues, but you don't really see them interact with women (for example), so they could be a bit one-dimensional for what you're after.
posted by rodgerd at 2:16 AM on March 31, 2009
Response by poster: We learn from those around us; for good or ill. If we're lucky, there is a good example for us to examine and bounce ideas of off. Not to copy, or idealize, but to dissect. "Media", once consisting largely of literature, plays an important role in transmitting ideas and values.....but sifting thru the avalanche of bad and stupid behavior is a daily chore. i'm looking for assistance in how to live a life.
posted by ebesan at 5:07 AM on March 31, 2009
posted by ebesan at 5:07 AM on March 31, 2009
Any of the men in The Best Years of Our Lives, by William Wyler... Jack Lemmon in The Apartment... Any of the Capra flicks...
John Wayne and Dean Martin in Rio Bravo...
posted by stenseng at 9:36 AM on March 31, 2009
John Wayne and Dean Martin in Rio Bravo...
posted by stenseng at 9:36 AM on March 31, 2009
Paul Newman's Sully Sullivan in Nobody's Fool
Kevin Spacey's Eugene Simonet in Pay It Forward
Paddy Bawn Enright in Maurice Walsh's short story The Quiet Man
Tom Hanks' Capt. John H. Miller in Saving Private Ryan
Chevy Chase's Clark W. Griswold in the Vacation movies is the quintessential family man, his idle fantasies of hot women notwithstanding.
Clint Eastwood's Walt Kowalsky in Gran Torino is an example of a real man from my grandfather's generation, although his prejudices are anachronistic today.
Colin Ferguson's Sheriff John Carter in Eureka
Keifer Sutherland's Jack Bauer in 24, is a very flawed, but good man
posted by _Skull_ at 9:41 AM on March 31, 2009
Kevin Spacey's Eugene Simonet in Pay It Forward
Paddy Bawn Enright in Maurice Walsh's short story The Quiet Man
Tom Hanks' Capt. John H. Miller in Saving Private Ryan
Chevy Chase's Clark W. Griswold in the Vacation movies is the quintessential family man, his idle fantasies of hot women notwithstanding.
Clint Eastwood's Walt Kowalsky in Gran Torino is an example of a real man from my grandfather's generation, although his prejudices are anachronistic today.
Colin Ferguson's Sheriff John Carter in Eureka
Keifer Sutherland's Jack Bauer in 24, is a very flawed, but good man
posted by _Skull_ at 9:41 AM on March 31, 2009
Response by poster: I know alot of these...... all great....and literature? thanks for all.
posted by ebesan at 10:30 AM on March 31, 2009
posted by ebesan at 10:30 AM on March 31, 2009
Michael Madsen's Jimmy in Thelma and Louise
posted by Neiltupper at 10:57 AM on March 31, 2009
posted by Neiltupper at 10:57 AM on March 31, 2009
Norm Gunderson, Marge's husband in Fargo.
posted by hot soup girl at 11:32 AM on March 31, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by hot soup girl at 11:32 AM on March 31, 2009 [1 favorite]
Sorry, if this isn't the exact type of media you are looking for but Seely Booth from the TV show Bones is an excellent role model. It's really the development of his character over time, especially this last season. He protects his friends. He sacrifices his own career advancement to protect his brother's career (bro had a drinking problem). He teaches his son to stand up for others, but just to walk away if someone is antagonizing him. He takes the extra effort to talk to a boy he just met about being responsible for his actions, even if everyone else is letting him off the hook. These are just a few examples, but there are certain episodes where they focus on him.
posted by CoralAmber at 11:58 AM on March 31, 2009
posted by CoralAmber at 11:58 AM on March 31, 2009
Gregory Peck in The Big Country. He's the anti-Western Western hero, pwning everyone without needing to "prove" how brave he is.
Patrick Stewart as Jean-Luc Picard in Star Trek TNG. Honestly, I think Jean-Luc Picard is the best human being ever. He always has the best, fairest solution for everything.
Stephen Boyd in The Inspector (also called Lisa).
Mr Knightly in Emma (the book rather than the movie, I think).
Tony Curtis in The Rat Race.
Cary Grant in People Will Talk.
posted by thebazilist at 7:12 PM on March 31, 2009
Patrick Stewart as Jean-Luc Picard in Star Trek TNG. Honestly, I think Jean-Luc Picard is the best human being ever. He always has the best, fairest solution for everything.
Stephen Boyd in The Inspector (also called Lisa).
Mr Knightly in Emma (the book rather than the movie, I think).
Tony Curtis in The Rat Race.
Cary Grant in People Will Talk.
posted by thebazilist at 7:12 PM on March 31, 2009
To name two cinematic (and somewhat idealized) versions of real people: Richard Francis Burton (Patrick Bergin) in Mountains of the Moon and Jan Schlichtmann (John Travolta) in A Civil Action. The Shoveler (William H. Macy) in Mystery Men. As far as Star Trek captains go, I'd go with Benjamin Sisko (Avery Brooks), who juggles command of Deep Space Nine, raising a son as a widower, and his role as the major religious figure of the planet Bajor.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:01 PM on April 1, 2009
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:01 PM on April 1, 2009
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posted by hermitosis at 3:57 PM on March 30, 2009 [6 favorites]