I want to have an ongoing relationship with my mom, but it is stressful trying to do so
March 22, 2009 2:13 PM Subscribe
I want to have an ongoing relationship with my mom, but it is stressful trying to do so. How do I cope with her?
posted by helios410 to Human Relations (9 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
For the sake of brevity, I will just say my mom has a lot of emotional and mental issues. Every time I talk to her there is some sort of nuclear meltdown occurring, and she has always been like this. But I am a young adult, and I am trying to get my own life in order.
She is not a responsible individual. For instance, I just spoke to her and she has run out of money, so she is afraid she can't pay her rent. And this is just one instance of many troubles that seem to occur by her own doing.
I love my mom. She has been there for me when I have had my own hang-ups or problems to cope with. But because of my mom's choices in her own life she, for lack of a better term, burdens those around her. I hate to say that. But it's true. I can't help but feel resentful that she puts herself, and those around her in a state of panic because she does not want to make the hard choices to put things on the right track.
I want to talk to her. And she likes to hear what's going on with me. I care about her, and that's why I get upset hearing these things. I have a career I am devoted to, and hobbies - but I let her problems seep into my own life, and I don't know how to stop it.
So for those that have dysfunctional immediate family members, or just want to give some advice, how do you keep yourself sane trying to deal with those family members, and how do I compartmentalize the chaos that endlessly seems to follow her?