Need advice re. crossing U.S. border for my wedding

March 5, 2009 7:40 AM

How paranoid do I need to be about crossing the US border to get married?

I'm a Canadian. I currently intend to cross into the USA to marry an American in California in May, then as a honeymoon take a leisurely road trip up the West Coast: drive up the coast, drop the rental car off in Seattle and re-enter Canada from Seattle (being picked up by my parents) to begin our life together in Vancouver.

I've been told by acquaintances that American border guards are extremely paranoid, though, and my best course of action is to pay the extra money for a return ticket and NOT tell anyone at the border I intend to get married and return to Canada with my husband -- essentially, I'm being told I should try to deceive the border folks. Their rationale is that the one-way ticket plus saying I'm getting married will red-flag me as not admissible, even though I am also presenting the rental car agreement (which is not pre-paid, so maybe not that "binding"), a copy of my municipal tax bill to show I am a property owner, recent utility bills to show I am living in the property I own, pay stubs and my business card to show I am employed, and a letter from my employer stating that I'm expected back at the end of May.

Neither of us are wealthy, and even the extra $200 for a return flight (uncancellable) or the $150 or so in cancellation and related fees for a $1000 "cancellable" flight would be a significant hardship. Plus, if the border is really in that high a state of anxiety, maybe a cancellable flight would be just as bad as none at all. I have no idea.

The idea of both spending $200 (or rolling the dice on a hassle-free refund on a much more expensive plane ticket) rubs me the wrong way. So does the idea of lying to the border agents.

If it matters, and it might: I'm white, Canadian-born and have always lived in Canada, mid-thirties with a spotless record and an uninterrupted employment record for the last 20 years. There's nothing "weird" in my past, and I don't fit any of the racial/social profiles that seem to attract extra scrutiny under normal circumstances. My fiancé is similar, except for a misdemeanour about a decade ago on an otherwise flawless record.

I'd really like some insight here: is it worth a hard-fought $200 that we really don't have, and outright deceit at the border, to try to get into the USA for a marriage when I really, honestly, truly have absolutely no intention of staying? How likely are US border officials to deny me entry for my own wedding?

posted by anonymous to law & government (18 comments total)

I must be missing something. Why would you need municipal tax records, pay stubs and utility bills? To cross the border you need a birth certificate and a photo ID (usually a drivers license). That's it.

In the near future land crossing will require a passport. I believe the date is June 1 but I could be off on that. But seriously, tax records??

If you are flying into the US to start your vacation a passport is required.

You are allowed to visit the US as a Canadian citizen for 6 months, for pleasure purposes, without any additional visas or other requirements. That's how Canadian seniors can spend summers in Florida.

I do agree that mentioning you are getting married could raise eyebrows and lead to tons of extra questions. I would not lie. I would say I was attending a wedding in California, then enjoying a vacation driving up the west coast. I would not mention it was *my* wedding.

For what its worth I have lived in a border city for decades and crossed over hundreds of times. It is not that difficult. Relax and enjoy your trip
posted by pixlboi at 7:57 AM on March 5, 2009

You are allowed to visit the US as a Canadian citizen for 6 months, for pleasure purposes, without any additional visas or other requirements.

This. However, the paranoia is warranted because you are flying on a one-way ticket. Commenters should see the response to this question before responding. I would also say, "I am vacationing in California and driving up the coast to return to Canada by car near Vancouver."
posted by muddgirl at 8:01 AM on March 5, 2009 [1 favorite]

Lying, for any reason, to border guards, especially concerning why or how you are entering the country, is always a bad idea.

You don't have anything to worry about, I believe. This thread would appear to back that up. In general, entering a country on a tourist visa (or the Visa Waiver, as you would) in order to marry and then leave is both legal, doesn't require a special visa in most countries, and will not result in hassle at the border.

Really, though, to set your own mind at rest, contact a US consulate in Canada. Ask them to confirm it in writing if you want something to take along with you.

At the border, answer the border guard's questions honestly and straightforwardly. It might go something like this:

You: "Hello"
Homeland Security Person: "Passport please"

Y: *hands over passport*
HSP: *looks at passport* - "What is the purpose of your visit to the United States?"

Y: "Pleasure. I'm entering to marry my fiance, and then we're coming back to Canada together".
HSP: *looks at you sternly* "How long will you be in the US?"

Y: "Well, we're getting married on Xth of May, then we're driving back from X to Seattle for our honeymoon and should be crossing back over on Xth of May"
HSP: "I see. Do you have proof of your intent to return to Canada?"

Y: "Yes, here is my rental agreement with the car company."

At this point, it will go one of two ways. The HSP will stamp your passport and wave you through (if they're especially pleasant, they might even congratulate you on your marriage). Or, they might ask for further proof that you do not intend to settle. At that point, you break out, for example, your lease documents in Canada, a letter from your employer stating when they expect you back from work, and the letter from the US consulate detailing your request to find out the procedure for doing this and their assurance that you have nothing to worry about.

You might be pulled aside and interviewed, or go through extra customs screening. Don't freak out. Just answer their questions honestly and refer them to your documentation.

You'll be fine. Good luck. Marrying across international borders is always fraught with this kind of worry and fear that the whim of some border guard will keep you apart, but for genuine couples acting in good faith, there is almost never a problem. Get in touch with the Consulate though, if only to help you chill about it all. And congratulations on your marriage.
posted by Happy Dave at 8:04 AM on March 5, 2009 [2 favorites]

Tangential anecdotes related to business travel: I, as an American traveling to Canada on business for only a few days, have faced serious resistance from Canadian immigration and customs personnel if I explain that I'm on a business trip. They insist on seeing a signed copy of some sort of contract with a Canadian company explicitly describing the visit and any services rendered and that is the only documentation they claim to find acceptable, showing no interest in tens or hundreds of correspondence emails I might produce from my laptop describing the same information, nor hotel reservation or other proof of where and when I'm going. Nor would they even accept my suggestion to call my Canadian client and speak with someone in person about the situation.

In one instance I had to make an emergency trip in the place of a Canadian business partner of mine who was denied entry to the U.S. under the same circumstances. (Though he'd made it through on other occasions, as had other Canadian business partners of mine.)

I find this state of affairs pretty silly and bureaucratic, since if you cross the border on a vacation or for some other personal short-term trip you get right through with no problems. One wonders what such red tape could actually be accomplishing.

So, not being a lawyer myself and not providing legal advice and all the other usual caveats, my recommendation would be yes, be paranoid. I'm the sort of person who normally goes to lengths to avoid being deceptive but for practical reasons, for safety's sake and with the purest of intentions since you aren't doing anything untoward or malicious or even trying to evade customs duties, you should lie through your teeth to the people at the border. And if your husband is in the same position and won't have a Canadian visa yet nor any other special documentation, I would say it would probably be best to do the same thing when you enter Canada together.

If things you say to the border people need to be retconned later on, perhaps formulate a story that the wedding was spontaneous and then you kept changing your mind about where to live.
posted by XMLicious at 8:40 AM on March 5, 2009

I assume you're flying out of Vancouver, so you're going through customs in Vancouver airport. I've always gone on e-tickets, and usually had my return ticket hidden somewhere, not given to the agent. This was never a problem. I have also flown one way (NB: 1999 or so) and no one even asked me why (also driving back).

When they ask, do say exactly what you're doing: "I am flying to California and driving back up the coast". Have your other information available, but don't hand it to them. Most importantly, look as if you are well-off. Dress nicely. Make sure your hair is taken care of. Maybe wear light makeup. I've been waved through (2002 and later) lots of times because I am a nice middle class white girl doing something *totally legal*. You're not breaking the law. Don't be worried. They often work off the vibes people give off.

(Obviously do not break the law. Don't bring in drugs, etc.)
posted by jeather at 8:48 AM on March 5, 2009

Can you fed-ex your wedding dress to your fiance, then drive to the nearest US airport and take a one-way flight from there to California? Oh, you aren't lying if you don't tell the Border Guards you are getting married - they don't need to know every detail about your itinerary. Sorry to be cynical but I have had too many bad experiences with petty US officers to ever trust them.
posted by saucysault at 9:00 AM on March 5, 2009

Wait, have you gotten your fiancee's status in Canada worked out yet?

If you have, photocopies of the various applications, canceled checks for nontrivial amounts of money for those applications, and maybe even his passport with appopriate stamps/visas in it should be pretty compelling evidence that you plan to return to Canada. If he has a work permit or other residential status in Canada, then bring a letter from his employer as well noting that he's expected back at the end of May.

If you haven't, if he doesn't have the appropriate permission to live and work in Canada, you have much bigger fish to fry than a wedding and honeymoon.

Why would you need municipal tax records, pay stubs and utility bills?

To establish that she does not have immigrant intent.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:04 AM on March 5, 2009

Their rationale is that the one-way ticket plus saying I'm getting married will red-flag me as not admissible

Yes, this is about it. It is reasonably likely they will tell you to go home, apply for a fiance visa, and enter on that. Yes, even though you are a Canadian who can theoretically cross easily with no visa.

Anyone confused re. "Why would you need municipal tax records, pay stubs and utility bills?" doesn't get it, here. I crossed, after being turned back late at night in a strange city because of a one-way ticket and US fiance, with a half-inch stack of junk like that and still spent two hours in a windowless box in an airport with a jerk. I got to sit under a poster explaining how the US is the very bestest country ever, so everybody needs a shakedown, even Canadians, because the whole world is dying to live in the US etc. I got to miss my flight and spend hours and hours in one part of the airport, not daring to cross back to Canadian soil. And then I spent years staying put with probably reasonable border paranoia.

An extra $200 is a bargain to avoid the potential hassles. The stress is not inconsiderable and it would be a rough start to a new life.
posted by kmennie at 9:05 AM on March 5, 2009

To reiterate:

If you haven't, if he doesn't have the appropriate permission to live and work in Canada, you have much bigger fish to fry than a wedding and honeymoon.

ESPECIALLY if he has a misdemeanor on his record.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:06 AM on March 5, 2009

Yes, I quite agree with ROU_Xenophobe's point. It's not the getting married in the states that's a big deal (although of course you have to show intent not to stay) it's the going back. From your question it's hard to tell if your fiancé is in Canada or not and if you've researched that side of things. If you have then you need to bring all that along and that will add to your all the other information you're bringing to show that you don't intend to stay.
posted by ob at 9:29 AM on March 5, 2009

Flying south and driving back is really a common vacation. Don't bother mentioning you're getting married (since they aren't going to ask you if you are, this shouldn't be a problem), and just get on your flight with all the other vacationing folks.
posted by Kololo at 9:31 AM on March 5, 2009 [1 favorite]

Flying south and driving back is not really a common vacation for two people with different citizenship, though.
posted by kmennie at 9:51 AM on March 5, 2009

contact a US consulate in Canada.

This.

I contacted the US Embassy here in Rome to inquire pretty much the same thing (me US citizen & my Italian Fiancé getting hitched in the US and then going back to Italy to live.)

Their answer was that he needed a Fiancé visa, even though I repeatedly told them that we had no intention of residing in the US.
posted by romakimmy at 9:51 AM on March 5, 2009

Dammit hit post by accident:

... They didn't seem to give a flying fart that we both had our own businesses here.
posted by romakimmy at 9:56 AM on March 5, 2009

Their answer was that he needed a Fiancé visa, even though I repeatedly told them that we had no intention of residing in the US.

They really ought to know better. A fiancé visa isn't necessary because he doesn't intend to immigrate. It's a destination wedding.

if he doesn't have the appropriate permission to live and work in Canada, you have much bigger fish to fry than a wedding and honeymoon.

This is also important, because being married to a Canadian citizen, by itself, does not give him the right to move to or live in Canada. If you can't afford the extra $200 each for the return ticket, the $1000+ it's going to cost you to make him a permanent resident is probably something you should stop and think about right now.
posted by oaf at 10:58 AM on March 5, 2009

follow-up from the op

Anonymous appreciates the concern being shown, but is excruciatingly aware of the requirements, fees, paperwork, formulae and other expenses involved in bringing her fiancé to Canada. An unexpected $200 is money they don't have, but the $1600 for the sponsorship application, PR application, Right of Permanent Residence, doctors' exam, and various FBI and state certificate fees is already in the budget. They're well aware of the legal complications as well, and have already discussed visitor records, applied for rehabilitation status, and are prepared to have a temporary resident permit issued at the border. In other words, inbound to Canada has been thoroughly researched and squared away -- it's the getting to the wedding part she's worried about.

posted by jessamyn at 11:19 AM on March 5, 2009

A related question often comes up on Visa Journey for people who want to visit their US fiance prior to the wedding and are worried about being refused entry. The advice given there is similar to the advice Happy Dave gives. You might want to take a look at the forums there so see people's experience with the border crossing.
posted by tallus at 1:30 PM on March 5, 2009

Here's a more succinct version of what I was trying to say above: AFAIK, a border agent having a bad day can put a stop to your wedding. I think that the opinions voiced here that nothing will go wrong because you aren't doing anything unlawful are naïve or otherwise just don't match my experience. Based upon what you've said you aren't going to be doing anything malicious, illegal, or even questionably legal (and in fact as Kololo points out is actually consistent with taking a vacation), so IMO and based upon first-hand and second-hand experiences it would be prudent, ethical, and appropriate to one way or another make sure that a border agent isn't going to have a bad day at your expense.
posted by XMLicious at 4:24 PM on March 5, 2009