Tomgirl Fashion

March 4, 2009 11:44 AM

You're a petite (5'1"/100) female invited to a semi-formal event where most of the women will be wearing dresses. You yourself do not feel comfortable in a dress (let's refer to your style as "tomgirl"), but you're definitely too feminine for a suit. What would you wear?

Assume you're also on a budget. Asking for a friend.

posted by granted to clothing, beauty, & fashion (19 comments total)

Pants, pretty shirt, and heels.
posted by kldickson at 11:47 AM on March 4 [1 favorite has favorites]

I'd go for a nice jumpsuit.
posted by specialagentwebb at 11:48 AM on March 4

Think separates. A co-worker of mine wore a pair of velvet pants and a sparkly top to our dressy Christmas dinner dance one year, and looked both terrific and comfortable. A skirt and a fancy top would also be appropriate.
posted by orange swan at 11:51 AM on March 4

One of my friends always wears salwar-kameez sets to those sorts of events. Price may vary, depending on how local you can be to an Indian/SE Asian store or resource, and how much time you have.
posted by Weighted Companion Cube at 11:51 AM on March 4 [1 favorite has favorites]

I would just wear a really nice pair of pressed black pants, heels, and a nice well fitting top. or what kldickson said.
posted by gwenlister at 11:55 AM on March 4

Sounds like you need either a feminine pants look or a masculine dress look.

Feminine pants: pants made with luxury materials and cut more formally-- silk pants with pleats or cashmere pants in a flowing cut or velvet pants with a tuxedo stripe, etc. Pair with silk blouse, good jewelery, scarf, fancy vest, nice shoes, etc.

Masculine (less fussy) dress look: Skirt that is long so you can sit or stand with legs splayed or what have you-- perhaps in muted color or less dressy fabric such as denim. Or skirt that is sporty such as wrap around or skort-type.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 12:10 PM on March 4 [1 favorite has favorites]

I'd wear high-waisted pants (good for elongating legs and accentuating a small waist) with a formal blouse. Pair with nice earrings: long creative ones add flair and dressiness, hoops and studs might be too casual. High-waisted pants look best with heels, but you don't need to wear stilettos to look nice.
posted by zoomorphic at 12:13 PM on March 4

I thought Eva Longoria looked perfect at an Oscar's after party. She looks pretty tiny so I'm guessing she's about your size...
While she seems to be a girly girl, the idea of nice jacket and flared trousers would look great among the evening gowns....plus the mono chromatic look never fails in looking chic.
posted by dearest at 12:25 PM on March 4

A nicely fitted black suit or tuxedo coat with a shell under it with either pants or a skirt should be comfy and chic.
posted by cestmoi15 at 12:36 PM on March 4

Hmm...

Based on your friend's description I'd say she can't go wrong with a satin pencil skirt (since it's a semi-formal event) and a top with a somewhat subdued color. Sort of like this
posted by seeminglyshy at 12:51 PM on March 4

a nice pair of black slacks or a skirt and a really beautiful shirt or jacket - something in a really nice fabric, like silk, or in an eye-catching colour and texture, something that shines or sparkles. Vintage and second-hand stores are great places to get this at a reasonable price.
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 1:23 PM on March 4

I'm pretty feminine looking but I tend to go for the thirties/forties look for formal occaisions, kind of Marlene Dietrich-y, basically wide-cut beautiful trousers and fitted shirt. Works for all hairstyles (plus hella-red lipstick to really scare the boys!)
posted by freya_lamb at 1:33 PM on March 4 [1 favorite has favorites]

Something to think about: With a pants ensemble, you sorta have to vamp it up a bit so you don't look like a 14 yr. old boy. A dress or skirt set can be worn alone without accessories or a lot of make-up.

So a dress (or skirt set) might be the more tomboyish option when you're looking at the big picture.
posted by politikitty at 1:34 PM on March 4

To be a bit contrary, I'd probably suggest wearing a dress. It's good to get comfortable in a bunch of different styles of fashion. In the long run it gives you more options for what to wear on any given day.

Lots of guys feel ridiculous in tuxedos but still have to wear them sometimes. Or a suit and tie. Look at this as comparable.

You should be able to find something you're comfortable in if you try on enough dresses.
posted by Justinian at 2:13 PM on March 4

Pants, a pretty shirt, and great jewelry. But if this tomgirl's looking to buy something new, this is just the kind of occasion in which I'd depend on the wisdom of one of the free personal shoppers at Nordstom, if there's one nearby. I've had great luck with them. You just make an appointment, show up, and state your budget and needs; they figure it out with you from there.
posted by sculpin at 2:13 PM on March 4

I'd wear a brand new, cute, fitted black t-shirt and a big ballet-like skirt, with flat ballet slippers. They sell beautiful big tulle skirts here, but I'm sure you could find something similar. You'll suprise people with the femininity of the look, while really wearing a t-shirt and flat shoes and feeling covered up and comfortable.
posted by lottie at 2:24 PM on March 4 [1 favorite has favorites]

High-waisted pencil skirt with fitted blouse. The high-waisted, knee-length skirt is really nice on a petite build- Hayden P (pictured) is about 5'0. It'll feel familiar to wear, because lots of skin is covered, the clothing has structure, and it won't require very high heels to make this look awesome.

Simple, modest shift dress in an interesting texture, with high boots. The textured dress is eyecatching, yet the neutral colour and straight, loose cut are comfortable and won't feel much different than wearing a sweatshirt! She can also do this look with a plain bright colour- it'll still be really comfortable & easy to wear. If she's not big on showing her legs, opaque tights would work here.

For something a little more revealing, she could try a fitted strapless top with dress pants in a neutral colour. The dark monochrome palette keeps the bare shoulders from being more sexy/flashy than she's used to, and pants are usually pretty comfy. Again, low shoes with this- like ballet flats- would look good.
posted by pseudostrabismus at 3:26 PM on March 4

I'm a similar size as your friend. This is hard without the age of your friend, but I would do this (I', 30 FWIW):
Tuxedo jacket (found here for $45 - plus check for coupons as they tend to have 30% off sales). I have this jacket, btw, and it's a deal.

Sequin cami or tank, example here, but there are a million others out there in all sorts of colors and dressiness levels - try forever 21 for one under $20.

and either a satin skirt or straight-leg sateen pants in black. Also, a pair of killer shoes. Again, you can find some decent shoes at forever 21 if you don't want to spring for anything else. Also, I have to do the short girl disclaimer and note that wearing nude shoes with your skirt will make your legs look longer. Also, nude has the benefit of being on trend for the spring.
posted by smalls at 5:40 PM on March 4

I'm liking the "simple, slim black or ivory pants, sequined or jewel-toned silk top, and simple, slim black or ivory jacket" idea that others have already mentioned.

Another thought is simple, slim black or ivory pants with a top in the same color, and then a sequined or jewel-toned lightweight silk jacket.

The thing is that the black or ivory bits will have many many other uses, and the WOW! sequined or jewel-toned bit will always be a reliable standout piece.

I think you should wear pants if you're a pants-wearer. But not a pantsuit a la Hillary Clinton's campaign wardrobe, and not a billowy pantsuit a la Debbie Reynolds at a movie opening. More of a "le smoking" look.

Or if you do want to go more femme, the taffeta or charmeuse "ballerina skirt" with a simple t-shirt in a luxe fabric, or a close-fitting cashmere sweater, is a wonderful look. Pencil skirts are great, but if you're not ordinarily a skirt-wearer they can make you extraordinarily self-conscious.
posted by Sidhedevil at 8:16 PM on March 4