Male pubic hair grooming tips and female reactions thereto

October 21, 2004 3:52 PM

Male pubic hair grooming. Looking both for tips on tools, technique, etc. as well as the female response - i.e. should I even bother? If so, what's ideal? Shave? Trim? Wax? Rogaine? Clean it up? Lose it all? Dye it blue? Context: gf just got a bikini wax and i'm looking to return the favor as a surprise.
posted by rorycberger to (40 comments total)

I have used the little clippers on the back of my Norelco electric shaver, and also a Gillette Mach III, to reasonably good effect. Do it in the shower or over the toilet, so you're not on your knees scooping up hair for the next half hour.

If using a razor, use aloe-based shaving cream to avoid razor burn.
posted by ikkyu2 at 4:03 PM on October 21, 2004

When manscaping, go no lower than a #2 guard.
posted by adampsyche at 4:06 PM on October 21, 2004

Wet shaving pubic hair is too itchy for me, though it feels nice before the itching starts.

I trim with a hair trimmer (no guard) and don't worry about the 6 o'clock shadow it leaves.
posted by selton at 4:10 PM on October 21, 2004

Everything I ever wanted to know on the subject, for men and women, I found in this Salon story: Porn Star Secrets. (Had a dickens of a time searching for it, too, as you no doubt have discovered while Googling on this subject.)

Me, I use a plain old disposable razor in the shower with some Body Wash, once a month. Veeerrryy carefully. Liberal quantities of aftershave follow, but do not apply any directly to the testicles. They don't like mint.
posted by brownpau at 4:32 PM on October 21, 2004

Jesus, are you people nuts? A mach 3 razor on that kind of skin? For real?

I used to nick my face whenever I used a razor on anything but the smoothest part of my skin. I can't imagine taking it over the wrinkles. How on earth do you prevent giant bleeding cuts?
posted by mathowie at 4:39 PM on October 21, 2004

Stretch and smooth, mathowie. Stretch and smooth.
posted by DakotaPaul at 5:00 PM on October 21, 2004

I do shave some stuff "down there" about once a week, trim the rest. If you go with shaving, the first time you do it you wil almost certainly itch like hell the next couple days. I find that with the once a week thing, regularly, the itch stops as the skin gets used to it.
posted by dnash at 5:15 PM on October 21, 2004

Pube grooming? This metrosexual thing has gone too far. You're a man, you're supposed to be furry down there. Hell, I'me even against female pube grooming. Does human vanity know no bounds, for pete's sake.
posted by jonmc at 5:33 PM on October 21, 2004

Trim back the branches, don't cut down the tree. Seriously.
posted by geoff. at 5:39 PM on October 21, 2004

jonmc -- Do you like your women shorn? Or hairy like a European hippy? Why would you think women like flossing with your public hair, either?

But for God's sake, don't shave it all off. It just looks freaky. Trim is the operative word.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:39 PM on October 21, 2004

To me it's not about vanity at all, just practical consideration: I figure my girlfriend might not appreciate a mouthfull of hair everytime she goes down there; I know I'll certainly appreciate her wax job much more for that reason than that it looks pretty. Thanks to all for the tips, not sure if I'm ready to go totally hairless yet, any tips on more moderate trimming? Do I need clippers or will scissors do? Should the hair be wet or dry?

[on preview: what Civil said]
posted by rorycberger at 5:47 PM on October 21, 2004

I like it bushy like Angela Davis' fro on a humid day. I've always thought that guys who dug the bald kitty look were closet pedos, but that's just a theory.

We're human, we're hairy. Deal.
posted by jonmc at 5:54 PM on October 21, 2004

> How on earth do you prevent giant bleeding cuts?

I have tough, durable skin, thanks to the magic of regular J.A.P.O.S.R.I.Y.C.!
posted by brownpau at 5:54 PM on October 21, 2004

Here's a tip: if you have time in your day to consider pubic hair grooming, you have time enough to make a difference in someone's life. Seriously. Maybe a hobby or something.
posted by yerfatma at 5:57 PM on October 21, 2004 [1 favorite]

if you have time in your day to consider pubic hair grooming, you have time enough to make a difference in someone's life.

Well, I can only speak for myself, but pubic hair grooming makes a big difference in someone's life.
posted by adampsyche at 6:10 PM on October 21, 2004

Rorycberger is making a difference in someone's life - his girlfriends! Use a beard trimmer with an adjustable guard. Wet or dry, it doesn't matter. Curly hair is curly hair.

Johnmc, do you like women to have hairy armpits and legs too?
posted by lasm at 6:13 PM on October 21, 2004

I prefer smooth legs, but I can deal with a little stubble. The armpits make no difference.
posted by jonmc at 6:17 PM on October 21, 2004

Actually my true theory on the shaved vs. bushy thing is that preference is to some degree based on the first porn you see as a young man which sort of fixes your idea of what a woman looks like down there. I first encountered porn during my late seventies childhood, when the ladies were bushy for the most part. Guys who were kids in the 80's and 90's probably go more for trimmed or bald.
posted by jonmc at 6:22 PM on October 21, 2004

Time to take the Guarini down to a Garfunkle, eh? Well good luck with that...

Like Mr. Miyagi said, "Close your eyes. Picture the perfect bush. Open your eyes. Make bush look like picture."

Or something like that.
posted by spilon at 6:36 PM on October 21, 2004

I have been shaving for 12 years now. It went hand and hand with my first piercings. The actual bush I just tame with an electric and a guard. I do shave the shaft and the boys. I have been doing it for years with just a decent razor. In the shower helps. A willing assistant helps more. It allows for a clean look and feel that seems to go over well enough with all who have taken the up-close and personal tour. I now just do the shaving during my daily shower and the trimming every couple of weekends. Use liberal amounts of a nice aloe or jojoba lotion afterwards.

And call me crazy but I think pit hair can be sexy on a cute girl.

TMI-filter.
posted by spartacusroosevelt at 6:39 PM on October 21, 2004

I have yet to see a girl with armpit hair, on whom I thought it looked bad or even not good. That's only two people, though.

I'll just wander off now.
posted by kenko at 6:52 PM on October 21, 2004

as well as the female response

I am like a European hippie, so I think I'm more in jonmc's camp on all of this: don't trim, and grow a beard. However, if your gf just got a bikini wax, maybe you need to do a Courtney Love-style anus wax, then again, maybe not.
posted by jessamyn at 6:57 PM on October 21, 2004

If you want to go completely smooth, I recommend the Feather Touch Personal Shaver. It really will render your skin totally hairless, if only for a day or so, but the maintenance is easy enough. Its benefits are that it will absolutely not nick your skin and it's entirely painless. And you *will* look like a porn star. Or a little boy, I suppose.

If you're going to use a regular, disposable razor, do not use the one you use on your face. You need a fresh, clean razor, because otherwise you run the risk of introducing bacteria to your pink parts. Make sure you use moisturizing shave lotion, and be careful.

As far as aftershave, you don't need it if you dryshave (with an electric razor). If you're worried about ingrown hairs, crush up some aspirin and mix it with rubbing alcohol and swab it on. It's a serious owie if you have cuts, though. Also, you can use antiperspirant. It tastes terrible, but it keeps everything un-bumpy and un-red. (It's a stripper trick, don't ask.)

Of course, if you do choose to go short (or bald), you kinda have to stick to it. Otherwise you'll be enduring a lot of itchy growing-in time, as will your partner.

In terms of personal preference, I don't like men who are completely bald. But trimming (with nothing less than a #2 guard, as adampsyche said) is IMO a good idea in that it a) makes your schvantz look larger; b) makes a more welcoming environment for your partner...no errant hairs, less area for trapped smells; c) offers a great deal more "feel" to the sexual experience.

But ultimately it's your call.
posted by cowboy_sally at 7:08 PM on October 21, 2004

Electric clippers and the #2 guard is easiest; scissors and a comb will do the trick; and if you're going Mt. Baldy, look into sugaring instead of shaving. Though I suspect sugaring your balls would be very, very painful.

d) cuts down on the dampness and subsequent itchiness. I hate long hair down there, it's just plain uncomfortable.
posted by five fresh fish at 7:30 PM on October 21, 2004

Where the hell is the grunge aesthetic when we need it?
posted by jonmc at 7:31 PM on October 21, 2004

My ex was into the hairless male concept. I used Nair. Head to toes. About a half dozen times over four years. Everything went. The only place I shaved was my eyebrows.

Feels really neat in silk sheets. The silk stockings were rather fun too.

If I am ever late with child support, she swears she will put the pictures online.
posted by mischief at 7:43 PM on October 21, 2004

please don't ever be late, mischief, ok?

I say trim only, if you must, otherwise i'm with jon.
posted by amberglow at 7:49 PM on October 21, 2004

Didn't people ask you why you'd suddenly became hairless? Surely your arms and legs looked strangely bare, not to mention your face.
posted by five fresh fish at 7:52 PM on October 21, 2004

I prefer my man unshaven in the pubic area, sorry, I just can't get into a hairless man.
posted by kamylyon at 9:27 PM on October 21, 2004

Jesus, are you people nuts? A mach 3 razor on that kind of skin? For real? I used to nick my face whenever I used a razor on anything but the smoothest part of my skin. I can't imagine taking it over the wrinkles. How on earth do you prevent giant bleeding cuts?

I thought MeFi was like the advanced area of the internet - do I need to put a disclaimer on this stating that I am licensed to "sever and penetrate flesh" in two states?

Seriously, I find my (admittedly Leno-esque) chin much harder to shave than my nether bits. And in any event the risk of scrotal nickage adds a certain frisson, guaranteed to liven up a dull Sunday morning, don't you find?
posted by ikkyu2 at 1:42 AM on October 22, 2004

A girlfriend of mine once explained the *cough* sexual advantages of shaving it all off. Both partners shaved, plus plenty of lube equals very little friction, leading to some kind of unfathomably awesome squooshy dolphin-sex-type nirvana.

It seemed like a lot of work for very little reward, like hand-shaving chocolate curls to sprinkle on top of your cheesecake. I mean, I already like cheesecake. Can't I just dive in?
posted by whatnot at 7:35 AM on October 22, 2004

"Does human vanity know no bounds, for pete's sake."

Since you seem to be asking this as a non-rhetorical question, the answre is: Nope. Nossir. Negative. Not today. Tomorrow's not looking too good, either...
posted by Irontom at 8:49 AM on October 22, 2004

less area for trapped smells

But-- but-- some of us thinks the smells is hot.
posted by dame at 9:08 AM on October 22, 2004

"squooshy dolphin-sex-type nirvana."
That is one of the funniest things I've ever read here.

Trim the hair in length is enough. Just because your gj got a bikini (which is rather tame in itself), doesn't mean that you should act in kind. Are you sure that she got a "bikini" and not a "brazilian?" Have you asked her if she would like you hairless? I get brazilian waxes, but I wouldn't want a man who did the same. I shave my legs and armpits, but don't want men to do that either. Men without pube hair look like 10 y.o. boys and sexually that's a big turn off for me. Depending on what your sexual preferences are, you may want to get an anal wax. It's quick and relatively painless.

And whatever you do DO NOT ever put cologne down there. You are not making it a more pleasent experience for us. The last thing I want to taste is Cool Waters when I'm down there. We know what you guys smell like and it's all part of the package.
posted by Juicylicious at 9:11 AM on October 22, 2004

Anybody else wish this post was run through the anonymizer? ;)
posted by terrapin at 9:46 AM on October 22, 2004

Anybody else wish this post was run through the anonymizer? ;)

haha, I almost did. Sorry.
posted by rorycberger at 10:59 AM on October 22, 2004

I for one admire rorycberger's candidness. He's just trying to please his gf, good for him.
posted by Juicylicious at 11:58 AM on October 22, 2004

and it also depends on how coarse/soft your hair is....there is a certain length that turns thicker pubes into razor sharp spears of death.

which my wife doesn't dig. nor I.

biggest advice, from personal experience years ago...dont' shave the whole playground. only do the main monkeybar and the boys. *The boys do not like it when the rest of the playground starts to grow back in.* 10 block walk, i thought i was going to Die.
posted by th3ph17 at 1:02 PM on October 22, 2004

I'm very glad this wasn't run through the anonymiser. Wouldn't have been anywhere near as much open sharing if the questionee hadn't the intestinal fortitude to put his name to it.

My thinking is that if you figure your question is too risky to ask publically, it's too risky for me to respond openly in public. If you don't bare your pubes, why should I bare mine?
posted by five fresh fish at 2:23 PM on October 22, 2004

MeFi: squooshy dolphin-sex-type nirvana.
posted by Tubes at 10:48 PM on October 22, 2004 [1 favorite]