A feminist gift for my mom?

December 20, 2008 11:34 PM

GiftFilter: Light-hearted feminist stuff for my mom? A good gift for a 55 year old woman asserting her "bad" side and moving toward self-empowerment?

My mom spent her life feeling pressure to be "good" and make everyone else's needs her priority. Maybe in response, she's always liked things that show people, especially women, rebelling and being "bad." She likes things like the Pirates of the Caribbean; the book Wicked; all those "teen witch"-type movies; the Anne Taintor cards, stuff like that.

Anyway, she and my dad are getting divorced, and she's redefining her life. So more than ever, I'd like to support this spirit of independence and female empowerment. Any ideas about what might appeal to her? Something with confident and empowered women as a realty, ideally (rather than passive-aggressive snark, or rebellion fantasies where female empowerment requires supernatural intervention). My default idea is a subscription to Bitch Magazine, but that's probably the wrong demographic. Any ideas?

posted by salvia to society & culture (17 comments total)

Weeds on DVD?
posted by No New Diamonds Please at 11:44 PM on December 20, 2008

I love Wild Words from Wild Women
posted by i_am_a_fiesta at 11:55 PM on December 20, 2008

Ohhh, 'Weeds' = so good.

SARK's books maybe?
posted by springbound at 1:16 AM on December 21, 2008

If she has the slightest sci-fi leanings then Battlestar Galactica is full of bad-girls kicking ass and taking names, none more than the 50+ president herself.

Most "third wave" feminist stuff is pretty tongue in cheek and self aware. Lots of fun t-shirts and magnets and so on.

Get your mom her own toolkit.

Check out feminist and lesbian bookstores in your area, I can almost guarantee that they have fun and appropriate stuff as well as books.
posted by Iteki at 2:49 AM on December 21, 2008 [1 favorite]

It's old, but a classic anthology: When I Am An Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple.
posted by goo at 4:48 AM on December 21, 2008

I've always been a fan of Northern Sun Merchandising - they've got a women/feminism section that might have a mug/shirt/bumper sticker she'd like. (I just wish their website was as nice as their print catalogues.)
posted by librarianamy at 6:01 AM on December 21, 2008

I recently read Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follet and it's sequel, World Without End. Both feature strong female characters doing uncharacteristic things in a time where women were expected to be nothing but be wives and mothers. World Without End specifically tells about the character Caris, who spends her whole life (and most of the novel) rebelling against what women ought to do, standing up to the men in power, and pursuing her own dream of becoming a doctor in a time where only men are doctors. Perhaps your mom might like them?
posted by geeky at 6:05 AM on December 21, 2008

Smart Women products are cute.
posted by Miko at 6:06 AM on December 21, 2008

Here's a movie: Shirley Valentine. Liverpool housewife finds adventure (and romance) in Greece, to everyone's surprise. Came from a well-known Broadway monologue piece, although the film has multiple actors. Won awards.
posted by amtho at 7:24 AM on December 21, 2008 [1 favorite]

Gina Davis has a number of kickin' ass movies. A guilty pleasure of mine is Cutthroat Island in which she is a pirate (the lead pirate). The IMDB comments seem to suggest it's a love it or hate it kinda movie.
posted by carmen at 8:50 AM on December 21, 2008

Before Weeds there was Saving Grace, great movie. Also Fried Green Tomatoes probably fits the bill.
posted by headnsouth at 10:40 AM on December 21, 2008

I really liked Prodigal Summer. I think it would fit the bill.
posted by BoscosMom at 12:04 PM on December 21, 2008

Sweet Potato Queens! The Book of Love is the first one but they're all great.
posted by The otter lady at 1:39 PM on December 21, 2008

A red hat, a purple shirt, a copy of the poem below and 20 bucks to buy a membership in the Red Hat Society "an opportunity for those who have shouldered various responsibilities at home and in the community their whole lives, to say goodbye to burdensome responsibilities and obligations"


Warning
by Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

posted by nooneyouknow at 2:12 PM on December 21, 2008

If she has a thing about pirates there were some historical women pirates she might enjoy reading about- one of these perhaps?

When my mother was going through a similar stage of life she became a big fan of some feminist Jungian authors- especially Jean Shinola Boden and Clarissa Pinkola Estès.
posted by Coaticass at 8:26 PM on December 21, 2008

Here's an AskMe thread about strong female movie characters where the poster, like you, is seeking real-world characters who are that way without any sci-fi/supernatural intervention.
posted by kalapierson at 8:41 PM on December 21, 2008

Seconding something from SARK. The linked item is currently out of stock, but from the description, you can get a sense of whether her style would suit your mom. Anyway, this "Succulent Wild Woman" design and message is available in book form (I first picked it up as a greeting card, but it doesn't seem to be available, at least from this site).
posted by cybercoitus interruptus at 9:16 PM on December 21, 2008 [1 favorite]