The little stinker has decided he no longer likes the bottle. What to do?

October 14, 2008 1:29 PM

My 9.5 month old son suddenly is rejecting the bottle of expressed breastmilk, for about a month now. He's behaving similarly with the sippy cup. Should we be worried?

My 9.5 month old son is breastfed, and since he was three months old he's had no problems taking expressed milk via bottle when I'm at work. He's with his father one day a week and in daycare the other three days. For the past month or so he's been refusing the bottle. He takes his solids, he drinks from my breast when I come home and 2-3 times throughout the night (probably reverse cycling? we co-sleep). But when he's given the bottle he takes a tiny bit, then pushes away or moves his head and doesn't take it at all. The pediatrician looked at his ears and saw no infection. He had a small cold, but that's over with, and it looks like his four top teeth are coming in which is causing him some pain. We've been gradually introducing sippy cups with water in it, but he hasn't been enthusiastic about those either. Should we be concerned? Is there anything we can do to get him to take his expressed milk while I'm not with him? Is there anything we can do to encourage him to use the sippy cup rather than the bottle? Thanks for your advice.

posted by tlong to health & fitness (13 comments total)

If your kid is peeing, pooping, and gaining weight then no, you have nothing to worry about (aside from lost sleep).

Sippy cup acceptance can be tough. Keep trying different kinds of sippy cups if the first kind did not work for you. Also consider those sippy cups with straws, sports bottles, and open cups. Now you have 20+ choices, try them out and see if any of those work.

I am not clear from your post, are you putting breast milk in sippy cups (not just water)? Try that too.

If your son won't take the bottle and you want to transition him to sippy cup, then just cut over directly to sippy cup.
posted by crazycanuck at 1:52 PM on October 14, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

This is a tricky, though not really worrisome situation that is pretty common with the older, more sophisticated, extra smart baby. He's figured out not only that it's nice to nurse with mama (something he's known from day one), but that he can hold out until when you're actually around. When he was a tiny, he took the bottle because he was hungry, wasn't sure when the magical mama would appear again (if ever), and willing to use the bottle as a suck substitute, as well. Now, he can sate his hunger with solids, knows you're always coming back (and probably about when you're returning), and is happy with his slightly reverse-cycled schedule (a situation that works well for a lot of working mamas. I encouraged it a bit with my son as he would never take more than a scant ounce from a bottle). As long as he's growing, you could go on this way for a long time--many older babies, for the reasons above, reject the bottle for good around this time. It's a kind of outgrowing. Your nursing relationship will likely be just fine, and your milk supply will adjust to be more abundant in the evenings and nighttime--if you're worried about pumping and being uncomfortable at work.

If he doesn't like a sippy, try a straw cup. To help him learn, take a straw and fill it via capillary action with your finger, and let it go slowly in his mouth. He'll get the idea that there is something in there and that this fun, and you can transfer the straw to a cup--and then to the no-spill straw cups. Once he's mastered that, a sippy is usually no big deal. He may or may not take expressed milk from a straw cup or sippy. If he won't, your caregiver could mix expressed milk with solids, try an open cup (some have success with an open cup and spoon), or move to evening and nighttime nursing. Some babes learn readily from a sippy or straw if you mix just a little 100% juice in with the water.

And then, this may all go away once those top teeth are in. Bottle sucking, unlike the nursing action at the breast, doesn't do a good job at relieving the pain and pressure in the teether's mouth, and can make it worse. Top teeth also change both the bottle and the breast latch a bit he he might not like it. Once he's used to his new chompers, things may get easier. Once the tops teeth are in, be aware that you may have to start adjusting his latch and changing positions again (like when he was little) to help with pain (your pain). The top teeth, unlike the bottom, are not covered by the tongue during latch.

All hail working mamas! It's not easy. It really sounds like he's doing great, is adjusting to all the new stuff fine, and that you're awesome. I am working on my lactation consultant hours for my IBCLC boards, don't hesitate to mefi mail me with more questions.
posted by rumposinc at 2:03 PM on October 14, 2008 [6 favorites has favorites]

You can try having him sip from a cup that's not a sippy cup. Actually, very young babies can do this. Just put it to his lips, tip it enough to get a little bit onto his lips, and see if he'll actually drink.
posted by houseofdanie at 2:11 PM on October 14, 2008

Great post rumposinc ! From my meager bit of experience I would echo trying the open cup routine. The novelty of an open cup was enough for my little one to take to it right away (we held it for him of course). Good luck.
posted by pazoozoo at 2:13 PM on October 14, 2008

Have you tried stepping up to a level 2 or 3 bottle nipple? After a while of enjoying his bottles our little guy also started to refuse them. The culprit turned out to be too slow a flow.
posted by dontoine at 2:40 PM on October 14, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

Also, just remember that a baby is not stupid or weak. He won't starve himself. I promise. Our son started refusing a bottle at about that age, so we said to heck with it and started feeding him solid(ish) food when he couldn't drink milk directly from the source.

Parenting is a total psychological game. 95% of the time when you ask "Should we be worried?" the answer is no. :)
posted by paanta at 2:49 PM on October 14, 2008

I'll second the advice on trying a regular cup - my daughter never really learned to drink from a sippy cup, but could cope with a regular cup just fine (held by me when younger, held by her as she developed her motor skills). She hated sippy cups.
posted by rodgerd at 3:35 PM on October 14, 2008

I wonder if it's time to start varying the contents of the sippy cup. Apple juice?
posted by Class Goat at 3:49 PM on October 14, 2008

I am going to caution against dontoine's suggestion of trying a faster flow nipple, if you want to continue breastfeeding. Once the bottle is faster flow than mama, some babies will refuse to breastfeed because it's more work! Of course YMMV, but I just wanted to mention it.

Otherwise, what rumposinc said, she already gave you the best answer :)
posted by Joh at 4:12 PM on October 14, 2008

He's old enough for an open cup. I am a fan of the Steadycup, but any baby mug with a handle will do. Baby here could drink from it without assistance from about 9mo; baby was closer to a year before she could reliably put it down properly, but that's okay. (At 13mo.)

But I grant that expressed milk is not something that's easy to subject to spillage. So why give it to him? He's old enough to not need it while you're gone.

From Canadian breastfeeding authority Dr Jack Newman:

Some Myths:

1. Babies must learn to take a bottle so that they can be fed when the mother is not there.

Not true. Some exclusively breastfed babies will not take a bottle by 2 or 3 months of age. Most, who have not taken a bottle, and even some who did accept a bottle in the first weeks of life will not take one by the time they are 4 or 5 months of age. This is no tragedy, and there is no reason to give a bottle early so that the baby knows how. If your baby is refusing to take a bottle, do not try to force him; you and he may become very frustrated and there is just no need to go through all this. If the baby is at least 6 months of age when you start back at outside work, the baby quite simply does not need to take a bottle. If he is even 4 months, he does not need to take a bottle. He can be fed liquids or solids off a spoon just as any other 6 month old and by 6 months of age he can be taking enough so that he will not be hungry during the day. Furthermore, he can start learning to drink from a cup even by 5 or 6 months of age. The cup can be an open cup and does not need to have a spout. Start with water as your baby may spill a fair amount at first. If, however, he has not got the hang of the cup by the time you must leave him, do not worry, he can take fluids off a spoon, or the solid foods can be mixed with more liquid (expressed milk, juice, water). Obviously, if the baby is to be taking a fair amount of a variety of foods by 6 months of age, he may need to be started on solids by 5 months of age. However, some babies prefer to wait for the mother in order to drink something. This is fine; many babies sleep 12 hours at night without drinking or eating at all.

2. But getting the baby to take a bottle surely won't hurt.

Not necessarily true. Some babies do fine with both. The occasional bottle, when breastfeeding is going well, will not hurt. But if the baby is getting several bottles a day on a regular basis, and, in addition, your milk supply decreases because the baby is nursing less, it is quite possible that the baby will start refusing the breast, even if he is older than 6 months of age.

3. Babies need to drink milk when the mother is not at home.

Not true. Three or four good nursings during a 24 hour period plus a variety of solid foods gives the baby all he needs nutritionally, and thus he does not need any other type of milk when you are at your outside job. Of course, solid foods can be mixed with expressed milk or other milk, but this is not necessary.

4. If the baby is to get milk other than breastmilk, it needs to be artificial baby milk (infant formula) until the baby is at least 9 months of age.

Not true. If the baby is breastfeeding a few times a day and getting fair quantities of a variety of solid foods, infant formula is neither necessary nor desirable. Indeed, babies who have not had infant formula before 5 or 6 months of age often refuse to drink it because it tastes pretty bad. (If you want to convince yourself of how little we know about breastmilk, ask yourself why it is that, although breastmilk and infant formulas have the same amount of sugar, breastmilk is so much sweeter). If you want to give the baby some other sort of milk, homogenized milk is acceptable at 6 months of age, as long as it is not the baby’s only food. In fact, if the baby is taking good quantities of a wide variety of foods, breastfeeding 3 or 4 times a day, and growing well, homogenized milk or 2% milk is good enough, but also not necessary.
via kellymom
posted by kmennie at 5:11 PM on October 14, 2008

One thing: one of my step-siblings quit drinking bottled breastmilk after her daycare started giving her formula and juice in her bottles. Her mom had no idea until she was talking to one of the caretakers there about how she wasn't eating as expected and was told how much the little one loved her new beverages :/

Probably not the case - probably exactly what the parents above say - but just in case, you might want to doublecheck the feeding situation at daycare/dad's.
posted by batmonkey at 5:32 PM on October 14, 2008

Hard to remember, but I think our boy started getting teeth in the front region, which hurt when taking a bot. But when we gave him a cool bot, instead of warm, he was happy again.
posted by lundman at 5:33 PM on October 14, 2008

Same thing happened to me, but a) I'm not the mom, so I really didn't have another option, and b) kid was too little to go on a hunger-strike.
I tried explaining this, but he wouldn't have any of it.

So... first thing that I thought would make -baby- hate me for life - shoved the bottle in -baby-'s mouth, while he scrunched his face up in anger, and then... 4 *pleasedon'tchoke* 3 *pleasedon'tchoke* 2 *pleasedon'tchoke*... and then one would have been roll -baby-over quick-time, in-case -baby- was choking, but I never got that far (sometimes blowing on the face to open baby's mouth).


The more effective method was bringing out a shot glass...
Baby's eyes lit up, and I could just tell that baby's thoughts were - a glass! Like the big people use! I'm gonna be a big person just like them!!
(The smaller circumference made it easier to drink from)

From there, I'm agreeing with other posters. Just give him food? He should be good for baby rice now, and you can make it up with breastmilk if desired.
posted by Elysum at 7:42 PM on October 14, 2008