Wedding Woes ... for Grandma anyway.
September 24, 2008 5:28 PM Subscribe
I'm getting married in Seattle next summer. My 98 year-old Grandma lives back in St. Louis and cannot possibly get to Seattle due to her ailments. She's on a warpath about it. How would you approach this?
posted by diablo37 to human relations (26 answers total)
The question isn't whether we should get married here or there, that is settled. While I obviously would love if my Grandma could be there, our friends are all out here and his family too. The only ones coming from St. Louis are my immediate family (four people) and hopefully a few old buddies if they can spring for it.
Thus far (since April) I have managed to dodge the question whenever Grams brings it up; I just say that we haven't decided yet. This is something that I lament, because I hate lying, so much more so to my family. The few times we did touch on the subject, she got really upset and lectured me (the way only a crotchety 98 year-old can do) about her incontinence and her inability to fly here and how it's my duty to have it at home because family is more important than friends.
So, the crux of my inquiry: How would you deal with this? I don't want to continue to lie to her, but the wedding is less than a year away now and I can't possibly keep it a secret, nor do I wish to. Yet, if I tell her the truth, she will become angry and sad (she's already prone to depression). She has lived a wonderfully long and healthy life, but I would hate for my relationship with her, my last living grandparent, to become strained because of this.
Any advice is much appreciated.